


Just Hold On

by DylanxGallgher



Category: One Direction
Genre: Age Difference, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Blow Jobs, Character Death, Fluff, Hand Jobs, Harry is a solo artist, Hospital Sex, M/M, Not that much though, Roof Sex, SO MUCH FLUFF, Smut, Sneaking Around, Spanking, Strangers to Lovers, agnst, famous!harry, i'll do more as i go on, lots of fluff, notfamous!louis
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-08
Updated: 2017-02-20
Packaged: 2018-09-15 16:49:58
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 8
Words: 27,995
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9246323
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DylanxGallgher/pseuds/DylanxGallgher
Summary: The one in which Louis has shitty lungs, harry gets into a bad car accident, louis decides to give him blood when the hospital runs out. Then things turn for the worse. Sufferage happens. Louis is not famous but harry is, louis doesn't take it seriously.Just a lot of shit happens. To both of them. Sorry in advance. Not really. Not at all.





	1. Prolouge

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Johannah Deakin/Tomlinson](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=Johannah+Deakin%2FTomlinson).



Louis wasn't where he shouldn't be. That's not a first. Or surprising.  
He was walking the hallways of the emergency room. Oxygen tank on his back, IV drip of pure saline water in his veins. His normal excuse was that he had high hopes for a transplant soon, so he was going to walk the halls of the hospital to workout the lungs that he had in hopes to keep them somewhat functioning and alive until he got new ones.  
Worked every time.

  
Louis wasn't just walking the halls of the emergency room floor. He was listening in for anything juicy. Something exciting. Something he could bring back to the crew and they could make up stories over. Like when this one guy came in to the emergency room with a nail gun stuck in his hand, they thought it obviously had to be a drunken bet that was lost and went wrong.  
Or when that girl came in and had to get her finger chopped off because she couldn't get a ring removed. It was of course the jealous side chick looking at the wife's rings and had to try them on.  
But when Louis was about to cross the hallway to the elevators he heard a huge scream come out. "We need those blood bags and fast or he won't make it!"  
Well if that didn't catch Louis' attention. Hooking off his IV fluid and sealing off the drip he pushed the roller into a closet and pulled his oxygen tank on his back. Walking clear of the nurses eyes. But close enough to see what was going on in the room of the event.

  
Well. six-- seven nurses, two doctors. a lot of blood. This was gonna be good. One nurse saw Louis hiding away, he held his hands up in a please sign and pouted out his lip. She rolled her eyes and held up her finger for the number one. Meaning this one time.

   
 _Thank God._

Alright. People were starting to go away from the scene and some things were being able to come to light. He saw a man. In a neck brace, Blood covering him. His hair slicked back. His heart rate was okay now. Maybe that's why everyone was regrouping. He moved a little closer to hear something the doctors were saying.  
"He's not going to make it through the night if we don't get transfusions in him. What do we have left?"

  
A pause.

  
"A shelf of B. Two shelves of O, but one is going to the labor and delivery floor. So we only have 6 maybe 8 packets left. It's not enough. He's going to use it all up in surgery."  
Damn this was serious. Louis needed more insight and needed it now.  
He was going to move forward in trying to get closer to said boy. He looked a bit handsome, kind of familiar. But nothing Louis could put his tongue on.  
About to go get a slice of pizza for the show, he felt a tug on his back pack, looking behind him he saw his Doctor. "Back to your room, now."  
Louis pointed behind him, actually getting an idea. A good one for once.

  
_"He needs blood, their not gonna have enough blood for him after his surgery. I can give him some."_

  
His doctor shook his head. "Nope, back to your room, now, you have test in the morning." Louis was a bit determined, he kind of wanted to be in on this. In person. On the front line.  
At this time, the doctor who was looking after bloody mcdreamy cute pants over here came in. "Is there a problem?" Louis looked up at him. "Yeah I have--" Cut off, of fucking course. "Nope-- just taking him back to his room. Sorry for this little shit." Louis rolled his eyes. "Look, I have type O blood, and I over heard you say you won't have enough after mystery boy here's surgery. I can give you some, even if it's two pints." The doctors looked at each other. Boy was this intense.

  
"We could use all the blood we can get for this guy." Louis huffed, quite proud of himself to get out of his shitty white walled room. Louis Doctor, Doctor David Marsh.  
Posh name if you ask Louis. David rolled his eyes and stared hard at Louis. A defeated scoff coming from his mouth. "Have you taken any of your medicines in the last six hours?" Louis shook his head, honest for once. "Fine. Just go over there and sit down and do whatever that person tells you to. Do you understand?" Louis beamed and spun on his heels and almost tripped over his feet, he felt eyes on him. "Lord let's hope he doesn't get your traits, we don't need this boy being fucked up.."

  
"Why? Is he famous or something?"

Well yeah he was, but no one was going to let him know that.

  
**-A mere 20 minutes later-**

"But I have to wee! I can't leave your sight for four seconds to drain my bladder?!" He roared. "Louis, you have two minutes to pee and get back here so I can stick your arm and do this directly , we don't have time to bag you. So go!" Louis got up and promptly half-ran to the bathroom and had a wee. After six bottles of water to plump his veins he was more than ready to to drain his bladder. A quick wee and a zip later he was walking out of the bathroom and scanning the hospital floor for that nurse.

"Louis! Here!" He looked to the voice and waddled the best he could over to her. Stuttering his foot steps when he saw the guy in the hospital bed. Now in a proper room. Stable and a little less far from death. He gulped thick and sat down in the chair beside the bed. He was handed a ball to squeeze in his hand as he was stuck with a needle. A pained expression left his face for a second but nothing more. He was absolutely obsessed with looking at this man. Hospital gown, hair pulled back into a bun on his head. Butterfly stitches on his head, from the bridge of his nose down his cheek. His lip was busted, there was crusted blood on his lips and he looked like he could die any second. However, he was the most beautiful man he had ever met.

Louis sat there and thought to himself: "Jesus if you're up there and listening, look, if this man is gay or even bisexual, I will donate like 9 million dollars to charity before I die. Swear dude." Sinking back into reality when he heard the click of the tubes being hung for the blood transfusion to start. The nurse looked at Louis and he licked his lips, "Go on then, he hasn't got much time, take what you need." She nodded and started the transfusion; Louis watched the blood flow from his arm to the other boys arm. The door shut with a loud shock and he was left in a room with the boy who was staring at the TV flipping past all the news channels.

"You're quick to pass the news. Don't like the boring stuff or are you more of a Spongebob guy?" Louis was quick to break the silence. A small, forced laugh came from the guy and he shook his head. "Don't feel like seeing myself on them all." Confusion obviously slapped Lou across the face. He shook his head and did a quick look over of him and rubbed his lips together in thought. He didn't want to play 20 questions with the guy but he also wanted to be mysterious with himself as well.

"Well, you certainly made a show out there, Harry.. What happened if you don't mind me asking." He finally got to see the most of his face when he saw him turn around to match his gaze. He was intriguingly beautiful. "What makes you entitled to ask me questions? Working for someone?" Okay, Louis mood towards this guy changed really quickly. "Yeah, I'm working for someone with oxygen being forced into my lungs and doctors up my ass to get back to my room. Just because you grazed deaths face tonight doesn't give you the right to slap me across the face. Wake up three nights in a row with water in your lungs, literally drowning yourself for more then ten minutes and you can be an ass to me. I hope you get a morphine drip after this." He coughed and held his chest. The cough was rough and hoarse, so was his voice. Harry's face dropped a little.

"If you're so sick, why are you giving me your blood?" Good question. Still a shit attitude. Louis brushed his chest and looked at him. "I've got nothing to lose. And I'm basically a walking dead guy so the least I can do is give you some blood until they can get you into surgery and patch you up.." Harry rolled his eyes, obviously just amused as fuck with being in a hospital. "Yeah wish they would hurry up with that OR room.." Louis gave him an eat-shit-and-die glare. "Okay, No. I don't think you deserve my blood. For your fucking information Mr. Stick-up-my-ass whoever the fuck you are, one of my very good friends has been in that fucking operating room for the last 17 hours getting a heart transplant and a bolt put in her leg. So they will get done with the room when they can make sure she's alive and breathing." He snapped. Louis was about to turn off the blood machine when he felt a hand on his. "I'm sorry."

It was the first emotion filled thing to come out of man bun for the night. Louis sat back and cleaned the ball, making his heart rate go a little faster and his breathing changed which caused him to cough a little. To much to where a nurse came in. "Hey hey, you okay?" She asked him. "Fine.. I'm fine, can I get my vest though? Will it affect this?" He gestured to the tube filled with blood. She shook her head. "Don't think it will.. Is it in your room? I can go grab it." He nodded and she was off running to go get it. "Vest?" Harry asked him.

"I have cystic fibrosis of the lungs.. There's a lot of like, it looks like plaque on the walls of my lungs.. Too much of it builds up and my body coughs to try and force it out. My vest vibrates really fast, kind of speeds along the process... It'll make me cough up some of it, but I'll live another day, hopefully.. And for your follow up question, my room is, exactly my room. I live on site here as an in-patient, I'm kind of up on the transplant list so I'm waiting for my new lungs to get here.." Harry nodded, looking like he could pass out any second, Louis covered himself up with a blanket and he pulled a lever on the chair that made his feet prop up. "You should get some rest. I'll be here for about three more hours.."

Sinking down in the hospital bed Harry looked at him. "Can I ask you a question, two actually?" Louis nodded. "How did you know my name, and what's yours?" Louis took his hand and held up Harry's wrist, gesturing to his hospital bracelet and put his hand down.. "I'm Louis.. Louis Tomlinson. You can call me Louis or Tommo.." Harry opened his mouth but Louis held up his hand. "You said only two questions. Go to sleep. Seriously, your body repairs itself the best and quickest when you sleep. You're stable enough to sleep, I'll wake you up for something, swear.." The man nodded and closed his eyes.

Should Louis take a picture of his guy and put it on twitter? Ask if anyone knows him? Had his parents been told? Was he joking when he said he didn't want to see himself on TV? Was he always an ass or was it cause of the white walls?  
By the time Louis was done mentally asking himself these questions, he heard a small snore break the sound in the room and he looked over to see Harry sprayed out on the bed.. Louis took the courtesy to lower his bed down so he could lay down and he covered him a little more. Turning out the dimmed lights, he settled back into his chair and leaned it out.

This guy couldn't be that exciting, right? He was just some guy who got in a shitty accident. Right?

Ten minutes before Louis fell asleep, he got his vest, he puked once. Harry was still asleep, he was still snoring, and his oxygen levels would drop then rise. Louis was starting to wonder if he would see more of this man than he thought..

Five minutes before Louis fell asleep, he took off his vest and chugged a bottle of water and brushed his teeth with something not toothpaste. He took another look at Harry and made sure he was still breathing.

One minute before Louis fell asleep, he looked over at Harry and whispered. "You're stupid. But you deserve to be alive. Hope you know that."  
He didn't. But he would teach Harry about it.

  
~***~

 

A jolt on Louis shoulder shook his awake and he gripped the sides of his chair and opened his eyes, blinded at first by bright hospital room lights but rubbed. "What the hell do you want? Can't a lad sleep? I just gave a bloke some blood, I'm entitled to be a baby." He looked over to the shaking and saw it was the little curly lad and he handed him a cheese burger. "Where did you get that, and shouldn't you be like, a vegetable or something? Go back to being slightly dead." He snapped a little rolled in the chair. He took a deep breathe and then looked back over his shoulder. "Wait-- is that a soggy burger from Wendy's?" Harry nodded and nudged it forward to him again.

"How did you?" He was starting to ask but Harry cut him off with half a mouth still full off burger himself. "My friend Niall came over for visitor hours. The blood you gave me, gave me a bit of a kick, And then they got a shipment in so I'm ready for surgery, Should be there in a few hours actually. They came and splinted my leg while you were asleep, said it was some pretty gnarly breaks in there, and my ribs are a bit broken.. But nothing secret burgers can't fix." Louis was trying to piece everything together in his brain. He rubbed his eyes and unwrapped the burger and rubbed his hands together for a bit of warmth.

"Wait.. Your friend watched me as i slept? And snuck food in for you? Why does Niall sound so familiar." He questioned. "Niall Horan?" Harry completed the name for him. "Yeah.. Yeah, isn't he dating a model or something? Irish kid? WAIT A SECOND, You know him?!" Louis examined the burger, he was a picky eater.  
"Yeah-- I work with him. He's my best friend, one of them at least.. You really don't know do you?" Louis sucked his fingers of ketchup and looked at Harry rather innocently. "Know what?" Harry chuckled a bit, actually quite surprised and half relieved that he could live for one day without anyone knowing who he was. He turned up the volume on the TV and Louis looked at it while he ate.

_**"Singer and pop icon, Harry Styles in hospital tonight after getting into a hit-and-run car accident. The whereabouts of the singer and model is currently unknown, but fans and paprazzi did video him after the car crash and things don't look so good. His mother and sister haven't released any information, nor has his team. We wait to see if he's okay, and we all hope he comes out of this alive and well... His awards were accepted and taken on behalf of him by friend and co-writer of his album - Never Be - Niall Horan, he too, has not given any detail on his friend.. More news to come. Thanks for watching."** _

Louis stared at the TV in awe. There he was. The fucking lad plastered on billboards, peoples shirts, signs, video of him at concerts, and his magazine spreads. He had no idea who the guy was, or what he really did or anything. But in a way, it was nice to Louis. He could give the guy a break... Maybe. This is Louis William Tomlinson after all.

He made an impressed sound with his mouth full of junk and grease then went back to eating it at full force. "So?" Harry lingered on the last letter and made an upward infliction at the end to make it sound like a question. "So what? You seem pretty normal to me. I wouldn't have taken you for a popstar. You look rather homeless to me.. You came in with jeans with holes in them, and your shoes were practically falling apart." Harry scoffed, a bit disgruntled. "Excuse me, I happen to win most fashionable in England this year." Louis' eyes grew wide as if he had heard some ground breaking- life stopping news. "Was everyone on the panel blind?!" He asked, quite staggered. "Is that an actual question or are you sassing me?" Louis shook his head quickly and swallowed down the last bite of his burger. "No, I'm legitimately concerned for who ever made that choice.. Your shoes were literally falling apart, Harry.. And I think I saw your pants had a patch on it, completely different color from what you were wearing! How is that fashionable, I mean where do you shop? The dumpster?"

Harry was cackling by now. Laughing so hard that the smile on Louis' face dropped when he saw Harry coughing now. Clenching his chest hard, his hand at his mouth when he was coughing, when he brought it down, thick clotted blood was dripping from his hand. Louis jumped up going to the door. "We need a nurse! Now!" About three nurses rushed to the room and instantly leaned him forward and trying to get him to breathe. "What happened!" One of them yelled. Louis was up against a wall and practically shaking. "I-I-I don't know! We uh- We were just talking and having a good laugh and then he started- he uh started to hold his chest and cough and then blood came out. I don't know what happened! It wasn't me I swear. It wasn't me!"

Louis was strong. He had been through a lot. A failed surgery to correct his lungs, waking up many nights with water in his lungs. Having to have a tube in his mouth for three weeks where he couldn't talk or eat unless it was to eat through another tube in his nose. Actually refusing to eat because he had accepted he was dying so he had to be tubed. But facing death, seeing it right in front of your face. He wouldn't wish it on anyone. Watching someone basically hold on for dear life to their last clinging breaths was enough to make Louis know he wasn't sleeping tonight.

His attention was pulled on when he was yanked out of the room and he yanked himself out. "No, I have to make sure he stays alive! Stop! I have to make sure he's alive!" He knew that people were counting on him, he had friends and family. He had privacy but Louis disrupted that when he hooked up his own blood to the man. Finally getting to see Harry through a small peek in the curtain. He bounced on his feet and bit on his nail. Watching this was like losing a loved member of the family. It was like losing a brother. Or a husband for that matter.

A tube being stuck down Harry's throat and watching him drown and choke on his own blood, his eyes started welling. He wanted to look away but something in his heart said he couldn't. He had to keep watching. A nurse attached a breathing bag to the top of Harry's tube and started squeezing synchronized breaths into his lungs. He watched his heart regulate, he listened to doctors calling the OR for emergency surgery. He felt the glass between him and Harry grow colder and colder, he tasted salt on his lips from his tears.

"He's stable. Louis you have to go back to your room." He turned to the nurse and shook his head. "i can't.. I can't.. You're going to need blood for the surgery, you're going to need things, I want to give those things." The nurse looked at him like he had lost his mind-- in turn he did and was. "Louis why are you--" He wiped his face with the back of his hand and let out a shaky breath. "I've got nothing to lose! I've been on the donor list for over a year, I do nothing but watch my pager everyday to go off but it won't and it never will. It doesn't matter you just have to make sure he's going to be okay! Do you understand!? You have to make sure he's okay!" The nurse sighed pitiful at Louis and nodded. "We will do everything we can."  
Instantly becoming angry, he pushed through the people. "I'm so fucking tired of hearing that. it's bullshit, find another meaningless and empty cluster of words!" He pushed past a guy with blonde hair and tired eyes, a cup of something that was probably soda and a giant duffel bag spilling with clothes. Mentally noting his face Louis pushed the elevator door open and he was crying now. More like sobbing.

"Why do you even care! You met him hours ago!" Louis walked into the elevator and pushed the floor 6 button over and over again as if it closed the doors faster. He slid down the back wall and covered his face with his eyes.  
"I don't know... I don't know.." He sobbed brokenly.  
He didn't know why he cared so much.  
He didn't know if he was going to make it.  
He did know something.  
**He knew he had to see him** **again.**


	2. He was there and then he wasn't.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I will proof read tomorrow. So forgive me for any mistakes.   
> Feedback would be loved, thank you guys for the overwhelming hits already!

He played with the fringe on his home made blanket his mum ave  him the day he came in the hospital and he listened to his Spotify playlist that was made for breakups but it worked for this too. 

And that's what it was all about. 

Louis had done some research on this guy. Harry. His full name was Harry Styles. Or Harold Edward Styles. He was from Holmes Chapel. He worked in a bakery.. He took that job seriously and probably take it to his grave. He was born on February 1st and had a dorky smile but his heart was so big sometimes people wondered if he an actual angel from Heaven.   
You could say that Louis was the one who did the research.. But really he just put out a picture he had taken of him and Harry's arm (which he first used as to show his friends why he missed the new years party on the hospital roof) and put it on Twitter, with the simple text of 'Can someone tell me about this Harry guy? I want to make sure my blood isn't going to an axe murder. Thanks in advance xx'

Within minutes was an understatement. Within seconds his phone was being flooded with notifications from Twitter of information, questions, comments, and statements about this Harry lad. He seemed to make a lot of people happy and Louis didn't mind that. He seemed completely different from what Harry sounded like before he started dying in front of him. Maybe it was Jesus telling him to cool it. 

he scrolled through his phone and he heard the rain hitting the window. It was dark outside even though it was 8 AM. He felt like he was seeing the same question over and over and over again, so he put his own statement out on Twitter. 

  
**_"I'm not close with Harry at all. He needed blood when he came to the hospital and I offered my arm." Read. Publish. New tweet.  
_ ** _**"He seemed like a jerk. He looked homeless. Would have never pegged him for having 11 Million Followers." Read. Publish. New tweet.  
** _ __**"But his smile alone could cure my shitty lungs. And I'm okay with that." Read. Smile. Publish. New tweet.  
** **"As for everyone asking. I don't know if he's okay. But i know he's okay. You should know that too.." Read. Try not to cry. Publish.**   


_**\----** _

He sent out the last tweet and put down his phone. He has barely gotten any sleep since that Harry episode. Which was two days ago. He's been asleep for two days. As he should be, his body needed to heal and Louis needed to focus on his own therapy and his own treatment. He heard a soft knock on the glass at his door. Looking over to see one of the floor nurses whom he had come to be friends with. "Time for therapy?" He asked with a dry mouth, one of the many side effects of his shitty lungs. "Actually no, it's raining too bad outside so Dr. Minugian couldn't make it. You're free for the day." Louis nodded and looked outside again, surely enough it had picked up. "Okay, thanks. I'll probably just walk around and help out at the kids ward, given no one is too sick." She nodded, it was something that Louis always did. He loved kids and he loved helping kids out. Sometimes people said his heart was too big too. 

"Oh-- and you have a visitor, Louis." She remembered as she was leaving. "I'll send him in." He perked up at the pronoun, surely it was Harry. Or maybe it wasn't. Why did he care? It was just Harry, he probably had more to do than spend time with shit lung Louis. However, at his door was a blonde haired man, he had seen his face once or twice on the telly but nothing more. "Oh, You're-- Niall right?" He nodded. "Mind if I come sit in?" Louis shrugged. "Yeah come on in, fancy a cuppa?" The blonde was hesitant but nodded. Louis gestured him to follow to the community room where all the tea and some of the patients were. 

"Yorkshire okay with you?" He asked as they entered the room, Niall wasn't talking much. That wasn't always the best sign but he didn't really know the guy so this might just be his personality. There were only two people in the community room and they were both younger so they were doing their home work. He was silent whilst Louis was making the tea and he was silent to sitting at the table. Louis didn't know what to talk about or why the guy was even here, but he went to open his mouth to ask how he was doing but he was cut off. "He's doing okay, He woke up this morning." Louis nodded as he sipped his tea and put it down. "I wasn't going to ask. But okay.." He seemed harsh and like he could care less but he was honestly just trying to find his head in all this. 

"I just thought you should know." Niall stated as he sipped his own tea. "I have no significance to the guy so I don't see why you're inclined to tell me." Again he sounded cold and harsh. "You gave him blood and--" Louis put up his hand. "I give blood to a lot of people, I have that golden blood type, it was really nothing. I'm happy to help, he needed it and I had it. So he's alive." He sported a weak smile and drank more of his tea. He spoke up again, trying to plan his words so he didn't sound like an arse. "Niall-- Don't take this the wrong way, but why are you here, and not with Harry?" The blonde looked lost for words and but he soon spoke up. "You made him smile."

Louis raised a brow in confusion. "Is that uncommon for him? I'd think he smiles a lot, given his job and I'm sure he gets surprised by fans all the time." Niall shook his head like Louis said all the wrong things. "He does. He smiles. But he was talking about you while you were sleeping in that chair, he smiled the entire time while he was talking about you. A smile I haven't seen in a long time.. It was really nice to see someone who made his smile like that." Louis was still proper confused but he decided to play along. "I don't know if i should be happy he talked about me, or if I should feel some what violated." Niall shook his head and smiled a little. "He just talked about how sarcastic you were, you always had some witty come back and you yelled at the TV when Family Fued was on, like they could hear you or something, it made him laugh is all.. He's been hard on himself his last album, he's getting really really into the spotlight these days and it's taking a tole on him. I think, because you didn't know who he was and you didn't freak out when he explained himself, he got a second to breathe. That's all he's been asking for."

\----

They talked for about 3 cups of tea before Niall held onto his stomach. "Oi, I'm hungry, can we order something here? Fancy a pizza?" Louis put his hands up with a small smirk. "Don't worry about it, I've got you. Come on then." He held onto Niall's arm and walked him back to his room and put up a cardboard plank in his window. When he turned around Niall had his arms crossed and he looked utterly lost. "It's a cardboard that says 'send pizza and fizzy room 909." Niall laughed. "No way! Does that really work?" Louis nodded. "Yeah every time, I get about 10 boxes of pizza, I keep like two or three and I give the rest to the staff and the kids down stairs." Niall jumped a little, a happy dance and laughed. "Shut up! That's awesome! Can't wait."

\----

More than ten boxes came, try about 22. Niall had two boxes and Louis had one, and they saved one. The rest went to the hospital, like Louis explained. "So tell me about yourself." Niall muttered through a mouth full of pepperoni. Louis licked his teeth and wiped his mouth. "Um-- I'm 25, from Doncaster, small town, I've got a lot of sisters, like 6, and one brother." Niall's eyes  grew wide, "How in the hell?" Louis laughed. "A lot of patience, many sleepless nights and a lot of makeup parties on brother." He laughed. "Uh-- I didn't get to finish school. I've had CF for about half my life, but it's gotten worse these last three years, the build up in my lungs is making it hard to breathe hence my oxyen, and I had to give up music school, cause I can barely sing anymore or have enough energy to play piano anymore... But i love cars, I love a good round of footie when I can, and I can't cook, I almost burned down the hospital so that's a very big no." Louis started coughing, something that happened when he talked on for a second. He drank some water and cleared his throat. 

Niall was asking all the questions and Louis didn't mind answering. "So-- Do you have like, a lot more time, or?" Louis made a sound that was to say something iffy. "They first said I wouldn't see my 15th birthday, then it was my 20th, then my 25th, but with how it's progressing, they say about three more years if i don't get my transplant-- speaking of which." He said leaning over and unhooking his pager from the charger and hooked it onto his shirt. "What's that?" Niall asked, gesturing to the pin. Louis took a quick bite and poked the on button. "When you're on the transplant list, you start at the bottom obviously, depending on your health. Like if you're an alcoholic or have done drugs, you're really really at the bottom, but when you start getting to the top, you get this little beeper, and one day, you don't know when, you'll wake up to a little beep, and it means your transplant has come in and you're gonna get a second chance at life that day.. I got mine about four months ago."  He shrugged and smiled. "You just kind of have to go through treatment until you get your transplant, unless someone gives you a DDT." 

Niall closed his pizza box, all too full now, as well as Louis following. "What's that?" Niall uttered. "A DDT? It's a Direct Donor Transfer. Say you needed a kidney, or two kidneys, and I go into surgery and there's a high chance I wouldn't make it through the surgery, I could sign a DDT to you, saying when I die, my kidney's or whatever organ you need goes directly to you, no one else." Niall nodded and Louis was about to speak when Niall's phone rang. "Oh, it's Harry's mom, I gotta take this." Louis nodded in understanding and whent to go pt their pizza boxes in the fridge he had in his room." The conversation didn't last long before he was back in his presence. "Hey-- Do you wanna go see Harry?"Louis shook his head. "I have things to do. I'll rain check it." Niall chuckled. "Actually no, let me rephrase that. Harry's asking for you." 

\----

With a new tank of oxygen and Louis actually taking ten seconds to fuck with his hair, he was on the lift with Niall down to Harry's room he was bouncing on his feet. Why he was so excited, he will never know. When the elevator opened, Louis practically ran out of the lift and to Harry's room. He looked better. He looked a lot better. He had some gauze on his nose and his leg was in a cast, as well as a brace hugging his right arm. He looked in the room and walked in. "Hi." He mumbled. 

"Hey.. You look-- exhausted." Louis scoffed and rolled his eyes. "Thanks, so much. It makes me feel twenty times better. You could put Ken Dolls to shame, let me tell you there little Chesire Boy." He plopped himself on Harry's bed and looked at him, being careful of his broke body parts. "So- how was surgery?" He asked looking at Harry who had a marker out and Louis took it starting to write his name out, but Harry stopped him after L-O-U. "Don't write, draw.." Louis looked up at his through his messy fringe, noting he needed to shower tonight. "I can't just stop at Lou. I've already wrote it, there's literally two more letters in my name. An 'I' and an 'S' " Harry looked up at him. "Lewis? Lewis is your name?" Louis' eyes grew wide and he draw a mark on Harry's good arm. "How dare you! My name is no such shit trash as a name Lewis! It's Louis! LOU-EE" 

Harry started laughing at him and put up his hand in defense. "Sorry! Sorry! When you write your name like that, you might as well say out it looks, just keep it at Lou.. I like Lou.." He narrowed his eyes at him, "Only people I care about call me Lou." Harry smirked. "You don't care about me? You must have cared a little to become a marathon runner from the lift all the way to my bed." Louis scoffed and started drawing on the cast.

Louis never did add the I or the S. 

\----

Time flies when you're having fun. Or keeping your mind away from the clock. When Louis looked up because his watch went off for lunch he looked at Harry. "I gotta go get lunch, want me to bring you anything? Can you have anything?" Harry nodded. "Something light, maybe a hamburger or I saw they have tacos today, I fancy a hard taco, I like the crunch." Louis raised his brows and nodded. "Noted. Tea or anything?" Harry moaned. Nope, didn't turn Louis on at all. Not one bit. "I'd love some tea. Have any Yorkshire?" He perked up. "You're talking to the chap that keeps Yorkshire tea in business. How do you like it, love?" Harry shrugged. "Just a splash of milk and two scoops of sugar please. But keep the bag in it, I like it strong." Louis nodded. But it fell when Harry moved a little and you could see the absolute pain on his face. Louis got up and looked at his IV machine. 

Clicking his tongue and shaking his head. "No no no, too low, they only do that so you don't vomit when you eat," He looked over his shoulder and around him and made sure the coast was clean before hitting a few buttons. "Louis, what on Earth are you doing?!" Louis shushed him and waved his hand in his face. "I'm bumping you up half a mL, you should be feeling beautiful by the time I get back down here. Don't worry, I know what I'm doing, I've spent half me life in this hospital , I know all the ins-and-outs. " Harry adjusted his body a little more. "Right. So that tea and tacos?" Louis turned on his heels and started to walk out. "Patience my boy, patience." 

\---

When Louis got back with a tray of tacos and tea, a handburger for him and a water. He put it on the table and looked at Harry who was staring at him with pupils blown. The green in his eyes had been chased down with blackness and Louis couldn't tell if he looked like a demon or a beautiful lust filled sex man. "Harry? You okay?" Harry leaned over and took Louis' face in his hands. What the fuck was happening. Harry chuckled. "You look so beautiful, like, look at this little freckle right here, it's so cute, it's right by your little button nose. H-H-How does it do that? It's just so small, and so cute, and your lips are like so pink, they look like candy floss.. Wha- What is up with that? So pink!" 

Louis laughed and took Harry's hands away and smiled. "Okay, I think we can turn down your medicine now. You are as high as a kite!" Harry looked scared. "What do you mean! I'm scared of heights! I don't wanna be high as a kite!" Louis shushed him and calmed him down. "No no no, love. The medicine is making you feel good is all I mean!" Harry sighed happily and he looked at the food. "Looks so yummy, like you." Louis looked back at him and was obviously surprised. "Alright there, curly. Let's not speak sober thoughts just yet. I haven't got a pen and paper to take this down with so I can get you back later. Um, might be best if I feed you so, let me cut this up and I'll give you some tea." He handed Harry the tea in a foam cup and let him sip on it while he fed him. 

"This is amazing. Who knew hospital food could be good!" Louis laughed. "Yeah, welcome to Heath Row Hospital, the food is amazing, every Friday we have chili soup day." Harry hummed at the thoughts. Just then a knock on the glass door had come to ear. Louis turned around and saw a nurse and what looked like Harry's mum. The similarities were almost scary. "Oh-- is he going home now?" He asked, a little worried the answer was yes. The nurse shook her head. "Quite the opposite." She held up a blue band and Louis looked shocked.

"Aye! You're getting a blue band!" The woman spoke up. "Something important about a blue band?" Louis smiled. The nurse spoke up. "I was just about to explain, were wanting to keep Harry inpatient for a while. His injuries may look mild, but we want to be sure of internal bleeding and to make sure no surgeries reject and that his broken bones heal properly.. This just means he's inpatient and will be moving to the ninth floor." Louis cut in. "I'm in patient, got a spiffy room and everything. It's nothing bad, but you can visit just about all day or summat. We have a lot of people up there who we just hang out with, were all pretty wild in a range of whats wrong with us, from shitty lungs, to cancer, to eating disorders, were all a bit broke, but were all blue banders, so we're like a family as well. Oh! Where are my manners I'm--" "Louis.. Louis Tomlinson." The woman said, the nurse put the band on Harry and shuffled out. 

Louis looked at the lady rightfully confused and a little scared. "I saw you on Twitter.. You're actually trending.. Hashtag ThankYouLouis is number two world wide." Louis looked at Harry and crossed his arms. "See! She said it right the first time, what is wrong with you?" Harry looked over at him and shrugged. "I'm a potato." The older bloke rolled his eyes. "Shut up and eat." He stuffed a bite in his mouth. 

Laughing Anne put a hand on Louis shoulder. "Thank you, love. For doing what you did, I'm sure you're indifferent to it.. But, honestly. Thank you.." Louis nodded softly. "It's not a problem. Glad I could help." Harry started poking at Louis thigh, trying to get his attention but Louis smacked it away. "Keep your hands to yourself, boy!" He laughed and started singing Can't Keep My Hands To Myself. Louis groaned. "Oi, this lad." Anne smiled. "Is he?" Louis finished her sentence: "High as Big Ben. You got it!" He tapped his nose. 

Seeing as Anne couldn't keep her eyes off Harry. Louis stood up and took his food. "Uh-- I should let you guys talk. He's got not much longer before he's out to sleep." Anne was about to protest, he could tell so he shook his head. "Really. Spend time with him before he comes up to the ward. I can wait.." She nodded and thanked him again but stopped him just before he left. "Louis!" He turned around. "What room are you at?" Louis smiled. "909.. Me names on it." She nodded. "Thanks again." He started to turn away. "Sure thing." 

Louis never stopped smiling all the way to the room. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tumblr: ohforfucksakesniall  
> Twitter: @_BellaAnastasia  
> Instagram: @_Bella.Anastasia


	3. Movies and a Dream

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you guys for the kudos and the hits! It's so amazing to see that people are interested in this when I came up with this on a whim.   
> I have an idea for another fic, but that will be for another time.   
> I would love to hear some feedback on my Tumblr, any questions you have are welcomed as well!!!   
> My tumblr will be linked at the end notes. 
> 
> Until next time, this is what you missed on GLEE. (it's not glee but i miss that show so I'm gonna say it)

 Toss and turn. Roll over. Pull the covers over his head. It was whatever hour in the morning, and Louis didn't like to be woken up until there was two digits on the clock. He groaned and sat up, rubbing his eyes. "Oh, Sorry, did we wake you?" Louis opened his eyes at the familiar deep voice and stretched a little. "What the hell are you doing in my room?" Louis asked Harry, his face now coming into focus as his eyes adjusted. "I'm rooming with you apparently." 

  
That woke him up rather quickly. "Why.. Why are you my roommate? I've been in this room alone for two years, and now it's going to be invaded by a lanky curly haired famous guy that smells like butter and frosting. " Harry started laughing but then that went to a cough. "Excuse you, I'm very offended, how dare you. I thought we had something special." Louis rolled his eyes and adjusted his canola in his nose and cleared his throat and spat into a cup at his bed side that he had for late night coughing attacks. "I insult your existence, yet your still here." 

Harry smiled and hummed. "I am only still here because I come baring gifts, I knew that we were going to be waking you up on a early morning, and it's Saturday." Louis put his hands on his heart and pouted sarcastically. "It's like I saved your life or something." Harry moaned and threw a bag at Louis' lap and rolled in his wheelchair over to him and sat a cup down on his table. "One cuppa, as you call it. Yorkshire, just how you like it, I remembered, I think. Also a hot chocolate for the cold weather outside, and in the bag is a bagel sandwich and some crisp.. Thanks to my old bakery." Louis tasted the crisp and hummed, but looking up at Harry in surprise. 

"Harry, you didn't have to.. Seriously. I'm just fine with cafe food here.." Harry shrugged. "It's a thank you, for what you've been doing for me. It's the least i could ask for. You're the first person to not give me hell for my status since I got in this thing.. It's really appreciated." Louis smiled as he tore off a bite of bagel. "Well considering I was very sure you were homeless when i first saw you, I can't look at your any other way, even when I saw Niall pull out five Gucci shirts from your suit case, I'm sure you still look quite bummish in them." 

Harry snatched the bag from Louis. Louis smiled. And then he halved it with him and they both laughed. 

\-------

"So what is everyone doing today? Does everyone just chill on Saturdays or?" Louis hummed a little at the question. "Usually we watch movies all day in someone's room, usually Emilee's cause she has a surround sound system and it's just bigger cause she got lucky." Harry nodded and looked around at the room. "I guess I better start getting to know everything while I'm here, yeah?" Louis nodded. "Might as well, when you get to know people, great things happen." He winked at him. 

Harry didn't know where to start. He wanted to make friends with people, but that seemed far fetched, given who he was and what he did; a chance of  _someone_ knowing who he was, was very high.. There wasn't a doubt about it. He left Louis to do as he wanted and he wheeled himself out into the hallway and looked around a little, trying to get a feel of where he was. "You doing okay so far? Moved in?" Harry looked over to see a girl. "Yeah.. yeah I just moved all my clothes in and what not, I'm uh--" He put his hands out for a shake and the girl took it kindly. "Harry Styles, I know.. Don't worry your secret is safe with me. I'm Emilee." Harry smiled at the name, given that he and Lou had just talked about it. 

"Oh yeah, Lou was just telling me about you.." Emilee nodded and smiled at Louis, giving him a little wave. "Yeah, are you participating in movie day? I have a lot of romcoms picked out and I can reserve one for you if you'd like!" She seemed pretty enthusiastic and oddly, seemed normal, Harry's mind wandering into what she was in for. "Yeah-- think you can save me, Love Actually and Eat Pray Love?" Emilee jotted it down on his arm. "Absolutely! I'm room 902 if you want to come by sometime and talk.. We usually start getting ready around one in the afternoon so you have plenty of time. I'm actually shocked Louis is awake right now." Harry laughed, looking over his shoulder at a now shirtless Louis who was scratching his chest and putting on his vibrating vest. Looking back at the girl he smiled wide. "Yeah-- I brought him a cuppa and some food." The girl stood on his toes. "Ahh the way to his heart. Awesome, I need to be going now, weigh ins and vitals and all that jazz. See you around, Harry!" 

This seemed good. Well it was off to a good start, he only hopes it would stay that way. He wheeled his way around the floor. Talking and introducing himself to people and having chats with people on and off, eating some breakfast with people. It was the first time in his life, he felt normal. Like he wasn't obligated to do anything or he didn't feel he had to say anything or act any way. Who knew that a car accident, some broken bones and internal bleeding could make up for being such a good things. 

He continued to wheel around to everyone and get to know them. By name, by illness and by how they treated him, Given that some p[eople around the hospital knew him. He signed some things for a few nurses for their daughters, sisters, stuff like that. But for once he was in a place in his life for the title moment that he could eat, sleep and breathe without a single camera in his face. That was until he saw a flash from the corner of his eye as he was rolled out to the window to see the view of the floor. Turning to look where it came from, low and behold it was Louis with a camera. 

"Oh." He smiled a little, turning the wheels on his chair to face him. "What was that for?" Louis shrugged with a half crooked smile. "You just looked in the moment, like you could breathe for a minute, you were at peace. So I took an off guard candid, hope you don't mind.." Harry laughed, "You have no idea.. Mind if i see the copy when it's ready?" Louis nodded and was about to say something but was interrupted by a patient. David, 17, blood cancer, used to be a footballer, until he fell out on the field and a few test later showed he was in stage 2 of his cancer.. He should live. Should. 

"Guys! Movies about to start, were starting with Peter Pan!" Louis perked up. "Let me get my blanket and I'll get Harry in me in there!" Louis grabbed his blanket that his mum made him. Grabbed his slippers and took the handles on Harry's chair and started wheeling him to Emilee's room. "Oh I could have gotten it. " Louis shook his head. "Nonsense, I'll get it for you, you can relax Harry.. No rushing in this place, you're in a  hospital, heal, you're broken."   
Broken. Harry was broken. But he didn't feel broken when Louis was around him. All the drugs in the world could make the pain go away for a minute, but Louis made it go away for the day, and he was okay with that. 

 

\----

Three minutes until it starts.   
  
"Popcorn, tea, ice cream?" Harry looked up, pupils blown from his medicine. He took a second to respond. "Uh-- Just  a little pop corn and water, my stomach isn't doing to great on these drugs.." Louis hummed and nodded understandingly. "Yeah-- i understand, you'll get used to them in a minute, but pop corn and water on the way, get comfortable yeah? I'm sure someone will help you sit down." He walked away to go get what Harry requested. 

Everyone brought in blankets and pillows and things to make the ground comfortable with, it was quite nice. Something traditional and normal for everyone to get used to. It made things seem like there was nothing wrong. Like no one was really sick, no one was broken. For the day everyone just was. There wasn't any hurt or anything. Just a room full of kids watching silly movies and laughing. 

Louis was pouring some water in cups and there was a beep from his back pocket. Just about everyone in the room dropped what they had in their hands and looked over to Louis, Tension in the room was so compacted it was almost chest crushing.   
He pulled the beeper from his back pocket and looked at it. "False alarm!" An audible sigh of disappointment. "Just need to charge it. Sorry I scared everyone." He walked over to where he and Harry were sitting and plopped down, "There we are love."

Two minutes until it starts.

"Doing alright, H?" Darrien calls out to the newest member. Still high as a kite he looks over. "Wha-- Oh, oh yeah. I'm alright, just not doing the best today. They said I can walk around and all that but to take it easy. Stitches and all that.. But i should be okay." "Oh, did they get your tummy tattoo? I would die if they got into it." Harry smiled. "Oh, no. No the butterfly is fine, yep." He responded to Laurie, small girl who did ballet and fell into drugs. Her heart was getting to big (in the wrong way) and she too needed a transplant.

"You have a butterfly tattoo on your stomach?" Louis looked at him. "Are you six?" Harry looked at him offended. "I'm gonna let that slide, however I am very high on drugs, I am not liable to anything I say.." He lifted up his shirt and Louis' eyes went wide. "Oh my, it's rather gorgeous.. How many tattoos do you have?" Harry boggled his brain a little and pointed randomly as to make sure he got them all. "About 60ish? Most of them are small things I got many at once, so they piled up quickly."  Louis smiled. "I've got like, 40 something I think. Me first one was this little skater guy, then I thought it was stupid so i got this Oops. I've got an airplane, a cuppa, it is what it is on my chest, 28 on me fingers. I'm properly inked." 

One minute. 

"Alright alright it's going in, Louis contain yourself this time!" Emilee closed the door and turned off the lights. "Hey, I can't help who I am. Thank you." Harry had a half mouth of pop corn in his mouth when he asked Louis. "Something special about Peter Pan?" Louis smiled. "Yeah, it's me favorite movie.. I love it. A lot of people say I look like Peter Pan, even more when I've got my beanie on and I have on leggings or skinny jeans." The movie started and Louis looked up. Harry swore there was a twinkle in his eye and he smiled so openly his teeth were showing. He wasn't sure if it was the drugs or just Louis being Louis but Harry was falling in love, quickly. 

\----

Louis started to stretch. His knees giving on him. His eyes glued to the screen. It was the scene with the mermaids. If you looked close enough, it was almost like Louis was saying the words extremely softly, like he knew every line to the movie. He probably did. He stretched out his legs and without even asking he swung his legs into Harry's lap and he moved his back to be against the wall a little more, not to much of a strain on his neck but he needed the stretch in his legs and this was a better position for him to breathe a little more. 

Harry looked down at Louis legs for a second before deciding against his medication thoughts and let his hands sit down on Louis' thighs. Out the corner of his eye he saw Louis crack a smile. He saw him soften a little and brought his blanket up to his chest more and chuckled as the movie went along. 

He didn't notice it, but Harry studied Louis more than he watched the movie. He noticed his breathing patterns, The way he coughed. He memorized his smile and every line in his face. He was far gone. Far to gone to care that he could be caught staring at Louis. Watching his chest go up and down was like a lullaby to Harry. He watched his fingers play with the hem on the blanket and his cackling laugh was soothing to him. Harry stole glances of the movie but he could quickly see the striking similarities between Louis and Peter Pan. Smiling at it, he noticed his thumb rubbing up and down on Louis' leg, at first he thought it was from the jitters in his medication, but he just liked the intimacy. 

When Harry started to rub his eyes, and he rubbed his head. "Medications okay?" Louis whispered. "Yeah, my head is pounding a little, i think I need to go down a dose." Louis smiled. "Gimmie." He pointed to the medication pack on Harry's side. Handing it over Louis pushed some buttons and adjusted the dosing. "Should feel a difference in a few minutes. Want to share the blanket? Snooze if you'd like." Harry nodded happily at Louis. Taking the blanket and moving around so him and Louis fit comfortably under it. Harry's hand took place back on Louis' legs and Louis leaned back into the wall. 

About the last 45 minutes of the movie were airing. Harry kept dozing off slightly and he looked to Louis. "Do we watch a lot more? I'm getting tired," Louis squeezed his arm and chuckled. "We all usually just pile in here Saturday nights. The nurses come and bring our medications and what not, and dinner. So you can just pass out. We all understand.. " He nodded to Harry who rubbed his eyes. Louis found it absolutely adorable. "I think I'll stay up until dinner. I'm hungry." 

\---

Dinner came and everyone was digging in. Hamburgers all around. "Milkshake down!" Emilee shouted. Her fight against anorexia was getting greater and Louis, who had been there since she was admitted couldn't have been more proud! "Aye! Look at that, five pounds in the hole, Let's go Emilee!" Louis gave her five pounds out of his wallet. "Every time Emilee eats a full burger or drinks a milkshake, she gets five pounds from me. She's saving up for concert tickets." Harry smiled. "Yeah? To see who?"   
Her cheeks heated up and she smiled fondly. "You." Harry looked down. Honestly thankful she would even think about such a thing. He finished his bite of food and wiped his mouth. "Keep your money love, I'll get you and your family in for free." he winked at her. 

Nurse Jackson came in, she was a tall, brunette with a fit body who almost never sat down. "Medication times. First off, all my oxygen people, how are we?" Agustus and Bryson checked in still almost a full tank. Louis raised his hand. "Fourth of a tank, could make it through the night." He shrugged. He got a new one anyway. "Alright here we go, pills, needles and iiquid all around. Check yourself off, no rush!" She called out. 

Louis took some pills, stuck himself with a needle. Being diabetic with shitty lungs was, well... shitty.   
Harry took some pills and got a new dressing.  
Emilee got a drink that made her gain weight, she refused at first. Until Louis took back the five pounds.   
  
Settling all back in. Everyone waited for the next movie to be put in. "Love Actually is next everyone!" Louis looked at Harry. "Oh my god that had to be you." Harry laughed. "What makes you say that!" Harry exclaimed. Sounding offended. "You're such a sap. My boy we need to toughen you up!" Louis patted his stomach. "I am a hopeless romantic, Lou. Not a sap, Thank you." Louis rolled his eyes and laid down. "Going out, Louis?" Called Darrien. "Yeah, just a nap. These new mid day pills kick my arse.. Someone wake me up in two hours?" 

Everyone set their alarms. 

"Yeah, I think I'm gonna go down too. I apparently need all the rest i can get." Harry sighed a bit annoyed. "That's right Harry. Sleeping heals the body. Louis, you have a free pass tomorrow/" Nurse Jackson peeked in the room. "Really? For what?" Louis looked over his shoulder. "You've been doing good in therapy.. So you're awarded. You can bring someone along as well, as long as their healthy enough." Louis nodded and went back to fluffing his pillow. Harry laid down slowly with some help. "Mind if we still share the blanket?" Louis smiled. "Not at all, scoot over then, I don't bite. I cuddle a lot, but I don't bite." 

Scooting over Harry laid down behind Louis who soon flipped over so their chest were both facing each other. "Night. Don't let bed bugs bite." Harry smiled at Louis. "Are you fucking four?" Louis laughed and brought the blanket up to his chin and moved to put his head on Harry's chest. Harry noticed how cold to the touch Louis was. He took his hands and sandwiched Louis' hand between his. "You're fucking cold." He felt Louis smile into his chest. "I was very young when I sold my soul to the devil." 

 

Harry laughed. Louis closed his eyes. Harry warmed Louis' hands. Louis listened to Harry's heart beat as he fell asleep. No one questioned it. Not even Harry. But he was comfortable and his stitches didn't hurt as much anymore. 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tumblr: ohforfucksakesniall  
> Twitter: @_BellaAnastasia  
> Instagram: @_Bella.Anastasia


	4. He started figuring it out.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Louis takes Emilee on a day pass out on the town and they talk about a lot of things. Treatment, Harry, the future, what they've been feeling... 
> 
> Harry meets Jay and they talk about Louis. Harry gives Jay a present of a life time. So on.

Day pass. So much to do in one day. 24 hours is a lot of time when you think about it. So much can happen in 24 minutes. Imagine what can happen in 24 hours. 

 

"Louis, I'm sure your hair is fine. You've been fucking with it for like twenty minutes." Harry's horsed voice cracked across the room. "Yeah yeah, I know. I just want to make sure it looks right. It's got to stay all day, Harold. " Harry coughed and Louis finally gave up on his hair and gave him a bottle of water. "Take the day to rest okay? No writing or shit like that, rest. Again, you're in a hospital. You've been here two weeks. Let's actually do what were supposed to here. " Harry laughed and when Louis was about to turn away he cleared his throat and grabbed his wrist. 

Louis turned around to meet his gaze. "I uh-- I need to talk to you about something." Louis furrowed his brows. "Oh my god, you're not proposing are you?" Harry rolled his eyes and shook his head with a forced smile. "Uhm. People know your face, Lou.. You've started to become a theme on my instagram and my twitter, i post so much about the family here.. But you a little more.. What I'm trying to say is, you're going to be in public. Paparazzi is a thing. They know I'm here. They know you're here...Just be careful. If you need a body guard I can send you mine. You don't have to answer any question someone ask you, you're not obligated to sign anything or even look at someone. Okay, it's your privacy. But i'd like my privacy to be kept as well. I hope you can understand." 

Louis' body softened. His heart ached at what he was saying. Taking his giant (and giant it was) hand in his and he rubbed and played with Harry's fingers as he spoke he licked his lips and nodded. "Yeah..... Yeah okay. I'll just tell them you're doing fine and treatment is just treatment. Nothing is promised but you're alive and breathing.. If they ask about us, were just good mates, yeah?" A tired Harry nodded. "Yeah. Good mates.. Just remember, you have every right to refuse any interaction with someone, you might get pegged a jerk or something, but at the end of the day its your personal space okay?" Louis nodded and squeezed his hand and dropped it back down and gave Harry his blanket, /the/ blanket. 

"Get some rest. My mom should be coming today to get me new clothes and all that. Chat with her, she knows about you, I mean you've talked to her on the phone and she works here, so just chat, yeah? Get some interaction in you've been so drugged up." Harry smiled weakly and licked his chapped lips. "Go away, don't you have a day to show Emilee?" 

Louis smiled and put his coat on and laced up his trainers. "See you in a few hours." He said turning out the lights and grabbing his pager and stuffed it in his pocket. "Don't miss me too much." Louis groaned at Harry and rolled his eyes. Sticking his tongue out he walked out of the room and over to Emilee's who was signing a bunch of documents to release on the free day. Knocking on the door she looked up. "Hey, come on in then." He walked in and sat down by her side. "What's up, butter cup?" He asked her. Louis was 25 and Emilee just turned 20, so she was a bit of a little sister to him. 

"Just looking over these approved meals I can eat. I need to have pasta and bread, and I need to have something sweet like a cupcake or milkshake." He rubbed her face and Louis knew all to well what she was feeling. "Yeah? How are you feeling about that?" Louis asked looking at  her. She grunted. "I don't want fucking pasta, it's so buttery and greasy and it's all fat." Louis smiled. "Yeah, true. But if you have the right kind of pasta it taste really good. Bread is easy to throw in, you slop up the pasta with it or something. Cupcakes or a milkshake can be eaten slowly, so you have time to digest it. But we just had breakfast, yeah? So we don't have to worry about it for a while." 

She smiled and nodded. "Where are we going?" Louis smirked at her question and wiggle two rectangles out of his pocket. "We-- are going to the zoo! And we're going to the movies and just taking a stroll. It'll be nice." She wiggled her eyebrows. "Oooh, fancy. I feel so posh." They laughed. "Oh shut it.. We gotta go, so finish the papers and let's get out of this place, I want to sneak a beer around before we come back." 

Emilee rolled her eyes and hit his arm. Today was going to be a good day. 

 

\----

 

About four hours after Louis left, Harry felt strong enough to get up and get some juice from the small refrigerator they had in the room. Taking a moment to sip it before trying to untangle himself from his wires he sat down the juice and began playing with them. "Harry?" An unfamiliar voice called. He turned to see a woman. Tall, brown hair, hopeful smile and a bag with a bow and what looked like a little suitcase. Only he could assume who it was. 

"Jay? Right? Louis' mum." The woman nodded, thank god. "Yes! Yes, lovely to see you up and moving. How are you doing, love? Need help with the little wire situation?" Harry chuckled and nodded, instantly getting a warm and welcome feeling from her presence alone. He let her help him out with the tangles and when they were done he straightened his shirt. "Thanks a lot. They had been annoying me for so long now." She laughed and held out her arms. "Alright then, give me a cuddle yeah? You're all free and that." He wasn't expecting it, but her delighting manner made him dive right into it. 

"So, Lou is out on a free pass day?" She asked and he nodded, inviting her to sit on his hospital bed and have a sip to drink. She seemed like the woman that never sat down. "Yeah. Him and Emilee are going to the zoo and all around. He seemed really happy about it. " She nodded. "Yeah, but 'nough about him. How are you dear? I know-- well hear so much about you from my younger girls. They love your music." He smiled and perked a bit. "Thank you so much, I'll be sure to send them something or we can facetime them if you'd like. I'm uh. I'm doing alright.. Uh-- I'm just taking it easy. Finally relaxing a guess, is it weird to relax in a hospital?" She laughed and shook her head. 

"Absolutely not.. You need to take it easy, seemed like a big wreck. What happened exactly?" She asked intrigued. "It was a red light runner.. It was just turning red, like they were trying to get under it last second, and we had a green light already.. So we started going, I was in the back seat on the passenger side, he was only going like 35 miles an hour.. What the speed limit was or a little over I don't exactly know, and we just almost got away from him. He got my door and the back of the van, they said a few more inches towards the front of the car and I'd be dead. The glass shattered in my face and all that, that's where the cuts come form. I got a seat belt burn on my chest, and we had side and back air bags but they didn't deploy for some reason, and that's how I got the broken ribs and arm and all that.. " 

She looked stunned, her hand on her heart and she listened with wide eyes and never looked away from his face. "My lord. I couldn't do that.. No no no.. Thinking if that were Lou or one of my babies that strikes me, I'm sure your mum was heart broken." He nodded. "Oh yeah, she still calls me every two hours during the day to make sure I'm okay and ask how I'm doing since she can't come out here, it's way to long of a drive and she's still working even though I give her enough money not to." 

"You're a blessed and beautiful soul, Harry.. It's beautiful that you do that for your mum.." He nodded and cleared his throat. "Since were on the subject, I know this is a bit of a personal question, but I feel compelled to ask for many reasons..." he took a pause before saying something. "How much are Louis medical bills?" Jay looked at him and put up her hands. "Harry, you don't have to do that. Really you don't. We have it covered. But tha--" "Jay.. I insist. In the last two weeks, your son has given me more pints of blood than I think he's allowed to. He has given me a time to breathe. A moment to laugh. He treats me like a person, and he's been nothing but a ray of sunshine to me. He talks about you all the time like you're a block of gold, but he talks about how he thinks he will never play football again, and how he can't pick up his sisters, and everything.. The least I can do for him giving me some of my life back, is pay his medical bills i know they have to be so much.." 

She sighed and licked her lips. "It's around half a million pounds... For his treatment and about another 200,000 pounds for all his equipment and stuff... That's it really. That's what's left.." he nodded and thought about the numbers. "So nearly about, 700,000 to 750,000 pounds of the money?" She nodded. "That's like penny money to me, Jay.. I really don't mind paying for it. Honestly... When it the blokes birthday as well?" She smiled. "Christmas Eve." Harry hummed. "How lovely. That must be a beautiful time of year." She nodded. 

He looked down and took his back pack and started going through his wallet. He took out his check book. "I'll write a check for 800,000 pounds.. Pay off the debt and whatever is left.. You take for yourself and the family okay?" She started to get tears welling in her eyes and nodded. He wrote out the check and wrote down in the for box "Louis William Tomlinson" wrote his name and looked it over and handed it to Jay. "After you're done here go straight to the bank and they'll call me and I'll approve it, and then you go straight to wherever you need to go and you pay it off and you don't look back okay?" She nodded with tears down her face. He wiped her cheeks and kissed them dry. "Don't cry love.. Okay? From what I hear from your son.. You're an angel, an absolute angel for what you do in this hospital. What you do at home as well. You've passed it onto your son. The fact he didn't hesitate or give second thoughts to giving me his own blood to save my life.. That's such a beautiful person. Thank you for what you do with him.." She nodded and they hugged for what seemed like hours. 

When they parted he held her hands as they talked about Louis and everything he has done. "Yeah! Louis tells me that every day before we go off to group. He grabs my hands and squeezes them and goes: "Harry, let's make someone happy today." I usually make him my person to make happy." She laughed and nodded. "i can tell he likes you.. He likes you and not just he likes you, but I can see love in his eyes. He might not know it yet, he's an oblivious one. But i can see it. It's a mom thing." She shrugged. 

"Oh, he's gay or something ?" She chuckled a little. "Something like that. He likes to say he has no interest in men, but he's had a boyfriend, I don't think he likes to put labels on it.. I think that's okay too.. And I'll say this now, you have my blessing.." Harry sighed and he blushed a little to himself. "Thank you-- but I don't think I'm his type. I wouldn't want to bring him into my world. I wouldn't want the cameras following him and I don't want people harassing him. I'm scared for him today to go out there, truthfully. I wouldn't want him to become me." She rubbed his hand and shook her head. "Louis is strong. He knows how to protect himself. But once he latches himself to someone, they are the center of his world and he doesn't let go of them.. You know? If he wakes up one day and realizes what I see in his eyes. He wouldn't care about any of it really. He'd have you." Harry bit his nail and smiled. "You really think he has a thing for me?" She laughed and nodded. "Harry, love, darling. You too, are so oblivious." 

 

\----

"LOUIS JUST ADMIT IT." "EMILEE WOULD YOU SHUT UP." She stuck her tongue out. "No, not until you admit it!" Louis groaned and shook his head. "There is nothing to admit! There is NOTHING." She groaned as well. "YOU ARE SO FUCKING OBLIVIOUS AND IN DENIAL." He continued to look at the fish and put his head on the glass. "I'm not, you're just over analyzing everything, like you're so annoying." "Oh my god, he looked at you the entire fucking movie, Louis. He couldn't stop looking at you. I was literally waiting for his heart monitor to go off and them to call a code blue for fondness overload!" Louis rubbed his eyes. "He's a pop star! Multi Millionaire! He's not supposed to like me! Besides even then, he was drugged up! He was probably zoning out!" Emilee gave up. "Whatever Louis. He'd be balls deep in your ass and you'd still say he doesn't like you and he doesn't have feelings for you." 

"Emilee!" He shushed her. "There are kids around! I took this day to come to the zoo, see some fish and lions and shit and you got all fucked up about Harry Styles liking me just because I happen to give him blood or something." At that moment, three girls turned around and looked at him. "Oh jeez. Yeah, about that.. I don't want any trouble. I'm here on a free day from the hospital and I just want some privacy, alright? Harry is doing fine, he's up and moving around but nothing is promised. Alright?" 

They nodded and Louis and Emilee walked away. "Okay, so let's play with the fact that  he does like me."   
"He does but go on." They started walking to the penguins. "Lou, don't you have one of them tattooed on your butt?"   
"Besides the point, Emilee. Anyway, so say he does like me. What am I supposed to do. The kid is as broken as I am. Tomorrow he has to see if he's going to end up on the list too, he needs a kidney and probably a new liver.. They're shutting down on him. What if I get together with him and he dies."   
"You make sure you get in his will at the last minute, marry him from justice of the peace and then you take the money." 

Louis stops walking. "I. Am not. A gold digger. Or a whore." She snorts. "That ass doesn't say so. That ass says you're gay and you're ready for pay."   
"Okay! Where is the Lions den so I can feed you to them." Emilee laughs. "They won't get much. I am skin and bones.." There was a pause. "The anorexic jokes are only funny when the anorexic is telling them." Louis laughed. 

Walking in silence for a while. They admire the penguins and the polar bears.. The winter-y cold animals. Louis plays with his hands and his oxygen tube.. He has an expression on his face like he's about to cry. Or he's really really into thinking about something. "Lou?" He looks up at Emilee. "Penguin for your thoughts?" Louis shrugs and looks back down. 

"I'm gonna give him my kidney."

\----

"Honey! I am home and full of pasta and sweets!" Louis called out to an empty room. "Harry babe?" He looked around. "About to get in the shower!" He heard and he looked to the bathroom door. "Oh alright! I'll be out here, I'll get in when you're done." He walked over to his bed and saw an envelope from the hospital. "Fucking bill. I know how broke I am thank you fucking much." He opened it anyway to see what he was being billed for. When he opened it and read the large text at the top, he dropped his oxygen tank, a loud crash on the floor. Harry ran to the door and asked if he was okay, his boxers still around him.

"YOU PAID OFF MY MEDICAL BILLS?" He shouted. Harry smiled a little and licked his lips nodding. "Y-Yeah.. Your mum came by today and we talks.. I uh, I wrote her a check and gave her a little more money to spend on the little ones." Louis was shaking at this point, tears coming down his face. "Harry-- you can't.. You can't just do that." Harry laughed. "But I already did." "I KNOW YOU ALREADY DID. THE LETTERS SPELL OUT PAID IN FULL LETTER YOU BEAUTIFUL TWAT." He rubbed his eyes and looked again. "Are you going to be okay? I don't need your lungs coming out of your mouth now, Lou."

Louis shook his head and looked at Harry. "I could kill you right now. But I could also kiss you right now. I could literally just do both right now.. They both start with 'k'. You know what, come here you bastard." He walked over to Harry and put his hands on his face and brought him in for a kiss. It was for the heat of the moment at first, when the shock of it took over, they both softened into it. Harry's hands went to Louis' hips to pull him in some more and Louis moved his head to kiss him better. Thanking slightly the curtains were pulled closed. Their lips moved in sync, slotting into each other like puzzle pieces. After about two minutes of constant kissing, both having swollen lips and Harry still needing to shower; Louis pulled away. The back of his hand touching his lips as to confirm what just happened. 

"Don't want to do that much longer.." Harry smiled and put their foreheads together, breathing heavy. "Why's that?" Louis smiled and touched their noses together now. "You'll end up like me. People with CF, we uh, we give off some toxic thing.. You could get a little bit of what I have." Harry shook his head with smile to match. "I think I'd be okay with that.. You take away my breath as is." Louis touched his own lips again. "You should uh-- you should go shower. I'll get your dinner yeah? Call your nurse to uh, change your plaster." More nodding, both of them wanting to do it again, and again and again. Kiss.

"You'll have to let go of me first.. " Harry stated. Louis had his hands on Harry's face, rubbing his cheeks, admiring his eyes. Louis took his hands away and was going to turn around but Harry caught his lips in one more kiss, a quick one but it took Louis' breath away anyway. Smiling like an insane idiot as he heard the water turn on in the shower he went to his phone and texted Emilee. 

'He's a fucking idiot.' 

' _what do you mean?'_

'HE PAID OFF MY FUCKING MEDICAL BILLS EMILEE.'

_'I'm sorry, he WHAT?'_

'He paid them off! I had a paid in full letter on my bed! He paid them off and I told him I could kill him or kiss him.' 

_'LOUEH. PLEASE TELL ME YOU DID THE SECOND ONE.'_

'Yeah. Yeah I kissed him. I kissed him and he kissed me, twice. I'm so out of my head right now, Em.' 

_'Tell me tomorrow! Stay with your boy you idiot! I TOLD YOU. YOU OWE ME 50 AND A MILKSHAKE.'_

'GOODBYE EMILEE. DON'T YOU HAVE FOOD TO SCREAM AT.'

' _GOODBYE LOUEH. DON'T YOU HAVE A PAGER TO STARE AT.'_

Louis checked his pager. Nothing. 

Louis checked his heart monitor. Off the charts. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tumblr: ohforfucksakesniall  
> Insta: @_Bella.Anastasia  
> Twitter: @BellaAnastasia


	5. The sun goes down but it comes back up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There's good news. And there's bad news. And there's crying, and there's more falling in love.. And maybe another kiss. This chapter is a shit fest. 
> 
> A good shit fest though. there's smut. 
> 
> Around 5000 words.

Test day. Test day. Test. Day. 

Not the kind of test you're probably thinking of, but like a test. Like a test to see if you're dying. Or well, how bad you're dying. Way worse than any school test ever.   
But it wasn't Louis'... It was Harry's. It was Harry's check up on his organs to see if everything was healing properly, and thought they were edging on the verge of coming to the close of the 2 weeks he had been there, a little selfish bit in Louis' heart kind of wanted Harry to stay longer, because everything was too good to be true and Louis wanted to make sure that Harry was going to be okay and he didn't want to get to know the bloke through a computer screen, or wonder when he was going to stop in again. 

And the worst thing of all. The one thing Louis fears the most. Was that this was all a joke, and that Harry would forget about him the second he left the hospital. He hoped that it wouldn't happen. 

"Louis, would you stop? I'm not going to forget you if I leave!" Louis was kicking a football between his feet and he looked glum. "Yeah I know.. I know.. But when you've been in here for as long as I have, you become selfish in a way, whatever you get, whoever comes in, you want to hold on for dear life, because you know their going to leave. But you don't want them to because then you feel alone again." Louis just about whispered the last part of his statement. He sniffled back and he let out his emotion more. "And you're going to go get your scan done and your test done and then in a few hours you're going to pack your things, and then tomorrow you'll leave.. And that'll be that." 

Harry reached out and over to him as he laid down on the couch and squeezed his knee. "That's not going to happen. I would pack you guys up and take you with me if I could. But you're sick Louis.. You need to stay in here and get better. And wait." Louis kicked the ball across the room and let his head fall back. "Do you know, how /fucking/ long I've been waiting?!" He was mad. Oh Louis was mad. He had every right to be. "Do you understand how shitty it sounds to be like, oh yeah I'm in this great hospital and all. It's going to be grand, but in the mean time, while I'm getting whatever treatment I can, I'm waiting for the right person to /die/ so that I can have their lungs. I'm literally death waiting for death to happen!" 

Harry shook his head and mumbled: "That's not true, Lou. You're so much more." Louis snapped, when he didn't mean to exactly. "I AM A GRENADE HARRY. A BOMB." He looked at him with stinging tears. "Not to be dramatic or fucking quote The Fault In Our Stars, but, I'm a bomb, waiting to go off. I've been waiting for two YEARS for this transplant. Holding on, seems like a joke, a /joke/, at first you wake up and you're like, 'okay, today's the day, it's gonna be today, my pager is gonna go off and I'll get me new lungs and it'll be great.' After the first six month you think it's every other day that'll be the day, then after a year it's just once a week, then it get's shorter and shorter until you hear your beeper go off to be charged and you literally sink a little every time you heart it because you just know it's not gonna say anything, but what hope you have left in your fucking slowly suffocating brain still says, but what if it is. Then when you look at it, your heart just goes straight to your stomach. It sucks, it's shitty, it's hopeless!" He's sobbing by now and all Harry can do is pull him into his lap and hug him so tight he's fearful he might cut off Louis' oxygen. 

Instead Louis is just balling Harry's shirt in his fist and wailing into his chest and Harry dares not to cry. He wants to be strong for Louis but he's just to right to hold on to whatever hope there is. He's failing when he stutters. "I'd give you mine if I could. I'd give you my leg, my arm, my lungs, my heart. My brain, my everything..  Id give it all." Louis hiccups through the tears and buries his face harder into his chest. 

There's a tap at the window and Harry doesn't let go. "I'm sorry for pausing this, but, Harry, we need to go. Should take 10 minutes. No less or more." He nods and hugs Louis hard before he let's go. "Go lay in my bed, rest your eyes. It'll be okay." 

Louis crawls in his hospital bed. He grabs the blanket and pulls it over his body to his chin. Breathing in his scent, he sniffled and hiccuped through his tears and watched Harry being wheeled off to radiology. 

\----

Louis was laying in Harry's bed clutching his pillow when his Doctor walked in. He looked up with scrunched eyebrows. "You never come do vitals in my room." He sat up and the Doctor let himself in and closed the door. "That's because I'm not here for vitals. I just got a call that you're next on the list. So this transplant is happening any day now, I need you to be on the scanner like a hawk. As far as I'm concerned I need you to watch your intake as well, food, soda, anything, I want you to be as clean as possible for surgery, be ready for this.. I just need you to sign these documents." Louis leaned up in bed more. "What are they?" Taking the documents and looking down at them and flipping through them as he spoke. "Just consent to treatment, consent to operation, signing your life away basically, again, just a bunch of consent, that's all. I can leave them with you or--" He trailed off to let Louis say anything, and when he started shaking his head he was sure. 

"No no.. I'll sign them all.." He flipped through them and got to the back and stopped. "Why did you give me a DNR paper?" David shrugged his shoulders. "I give them to all my patients, most of them request a Do Not Resuscitate when going in for a transplant, their so risky." Louis handed it back to him. "I don't want it.. But, can you get me two DDT's? " David nodded. "What for?" Louis looked at him with red eyes. "I have a feeling Harry is going to need my kidneys and whatever blood, plates, anything he needs.. Whos in line after me? Do you know?" The doctor nodded but looked confused. "Yeah, Emilee is... Um, But you said two.." Louis looked at him and signed. "And give Emilee, my heart." David sank a little and nodded. "Okay, sign those and I'll give them to you. You sure you don't want the DNR?"

Louis shook his head with pressed lips. "No, If I die on the table. I'd like you to try one last time, however.. if I don't come back, I don't come back. But if you can, just take the kidney out while you're in there. I can live with one, but keep it on ice for Harry.. Obviously don't take my heart, but if the transplant doesn't take." David dropped in. "There isn't a reason it shou--" Louis held up his hand to talk. "If the transplant doesn't take.. Give Emilee the heart, no questions asked. She's like a sister to me. She's trying, she's been back here four times but she's trying.. She deserves to try and live as long as she can."

He left the room and Louis signed all the papers and waited for him to come back with the donor transfers.

He looked at them and with a shaky hand he put the pen to the paper.

Donor transfer to: _Harold Edward Styles._  
Primary Donor: _Louis William Tomlinson  
_ Donation of:  _Kidney, R or L as necessary_  
                    4 Pints of Type: O blood  
                    Anything deemed necessary at time of Operation

_Signed: LOUIS TOMLINSON_

Donor transfer to:  _Emilee Aaliyah Hedington  
_ Primary Donor:  _Louis William Tomlinson_  
Donation of:  _Heart_  
                    4 Pints of Type: O blood  
                    Anything deemed necessary at time of Operation

_Signed: LOUIS TOMLINSON_

\------

Louis had his eyes on his pager when Harry walked in 30 minuets later. As soon as he opened the door he knew something was wrong. "What happened?" Louis looked up and smiled. "I got moved to the top. I'm next in line on the donor list.. I just had to sign all my papers." Harry smiled wide. "Babe, that's amazing! But you look sad.." Louis wiped his face. "These things are uh, their not like a it'll work type thing, even if the transplant operation goes 100% right, it could reject in hours. I could die, Harry, do you understand that." The tension in the room changed and Harry sat next to Louis and had his hand on his leg. 

"I understand that, though I'm trying to be optimistic. " Louis smiled and put his hand on top of his. "I am too. I am too.. But, that's a serious thing that could very well happen. And I want to be prepared for it. Okay? The success rate is very high and I give my life to Dr. David. He's done this many many many times before, none of his patients have died but I just want you to know that. And because of that, I give you this."

Harry took the piece of paper from Louis and opened it. He instantly put his hand over his mouth and tears streamed down his eyes. "Louis..." He ran a hand through Harry's hair. "They don't keep you in that room for that long without bad news. This isn't a transfer if I die.. Their going to take the kidney and what blood I have stocked and give it to you. This is the definition of a direct transfer.. When I get out of my surgery and I'm deemed healthy if the transfer takes. You'll be getting my kidney." Harry licked  his lips and just pulled Louis into him and held him tight. He adjusted himself to be in Harry's lap and held him tight.

They held each other for what seemed like hours and he pulled away and wiped Harry's face. "What the uh-- what's the other one for?" Harry pointed to the other paper. "That's the bad part. If i die on the table.. Or happen to die from a rejection.. I am.. giving Emilee my heart." Harry just smiled at Louis. "Louis... That's so brave.." He laughed. "I kind of feel like this one should have gone to you." Louis said to Harry.

"I don't need it. I've already got your heart." The smaller boy rolled his eyes and scrunched Harry's face together. "YOU'RE SUCH A SAP." He smiled and Harry looked up at Louis and watched his eyes sparkle and Louis put their heads together. "So is this the part where we kiss now?" Louis asked. "Oh, but I'm the sap." He paused. "Yes, this is the part where we kiss." Louis laughed and leaned down to connect their lips and bury his hands in Harry's hair and kissed for about ten seconds before he pulled away to cough a little.

"Damn, i guess I take your breath away!" Louis glared at him. "You've ruined the moment, I need to go talk to Emilee." He got off his lap and Harry followed him to Emilee's room and saw a few other people there. "Oh, hey babes.. What's--- What's wrong?" She asked seeing them both red eyed and dried tears on their faces. "I'm next on the list, and you're after me." Emilee eyes got to wide. "Louis!" She shot up and hugged him. He coughed a little on impact. "Careful babe, i still have shit lungs for the next few days."

"Is that what you came to tell me?" She asked and Louis shook his head and gave her the paper. "What's this?" He shrugged. "Dunno, read it." They walked to sit on the section of couches and Harry sat down with them and put his arm around Louis' shoulders and the boy moved in to slot into his side. Were they a thing now? Was this the place to bring it up? Is there even a thing.

Watching Emilee's eyes scan the paper and she started breaking down. "Louis! No! I'm not letting you do this!" She read it again as if she was making sure it was true. "I can't do this.." Louis shook his head and held her hands. "You've been doing so so so amazing, Emilee. SO amazing.. I'm so proud of you my love.. This is what I can do for you if this is the end of my days." She lunged forward and hugged him tight. "Thank you so much.. Thank you so much." She cried out into his shoulder. At this time everyone knew was what going on, everyone was crying. Everyone. When they pulled apart Harry croaked. "At least you'll have a heart of gold. A beautiful one at that." She nodded and looked at him. "How was your test, are you okay?"

Harry scoffed. "My kidney's are still swelling.. It hasn't gone down and they don't think it will. The treatment is working but not as they hoped, but I don't have to worry.. Erm.. Louis is giving me his kidney at his operation.." Emilee just looked between the two with the biggest grin.. "That's so lovely. Next you should give him your hand in marriage Louis." He groaned. "OH MY GOD, JUST HUSH IT."

They all laughed. Still cried. And Harry uploaded a picture onto his Instagram: "He gave me his blood, but apparently that wasn't enough, so he's gonna give me his kidney too. This is the real shit, guys xx"

After everything died down and Harry's hand was on Louis' thigh rubbing circles into it and he was squeezing it every once in a while and honestly it was getting Louis hot and bothered. He had a semi and he swore that the other lad was purposely squeezing his leg higher and higher till he got to just the tip and then stopped. When everything seemed to be okay now, Louis looked around. "Well, I think we're going to-- at least I'm wanting to turn in for the night, i have treatment tomorrow and my mum is coming to see me, so wanna be early for that since she has an early shift." 

He got up and of course Harry followed, he walked in, wanting just a wank in the shower honestly. " 'M gonna take a shower." He told the taller man. "Yeah, i need to brush my teeth and wash my face, mind if I--" Louis shook his head and got his clothes. I was obvious now that Harry was making excuses to get in the bathroom with him. He grabbed his clothes and met him in the bathroom where Louis was trying to reach his tooth brush on the top shelf and with how short he was, it wasn't going well. 

"Here, short shit, I've got it." Louis was about to turn around to glare at him when he pressed right against his body in the back and Louis could feel his hard on press against him. "For god sakes, Harry." He said moving out of him. "What!? I'm just trying--" Louis popped his hip out and looked at him for a second before taking off his shirt. "Drop em." He gestured to his pants and Harry went red with a smirk on his face and he motioned for Louis to come close to him and locked the door. 

Harry pulled him in for a kiss and Louis happily took it. It wasn't like their first two. It was hot, steamy, built up. This has been needing to happen for a few days. Something that was deep inside them and they were ready for this. "So, did I become successful in getting you steamed?" Harry blurted out between kisses and Louis moved his hand down Harry's body and unbuttoned his pants and pushed his hands past his opening jeans and-- "You're not wearing trousers?" Louis asked as he made his way to Harry's dick and gave it a squeeze to which Harry's eyes went closed and the moan from his throat was the last thing Louis needed to hear

"I don't like wearing them.." Harry said with his head against the wall as Louis teased his sensitive member. Leaning up on his tip toes to kiss Harry's exposed neck he licked and sucked softly, but nipped mostly. "I think you got yourself more fucked than me." Louis whispered in his ear. "Oh god, Louis just get on your knee's" Louis smiled and sank down to his knees and unzipped Harry's pants and slowly got them to his ankles as his dick sprang up and hit his stomach.

"Fucking hell." Louis mumbled while he pulled it down and swirled his tongue around the head. "Oh fuck." Harry fist his hair and looked down at his eyes. How the fuck did Louis look so innocent, so wide eyed with a dick at his lips. Harry leaked precome onto Louis' mouth who rubbed his lips together and licked them. He could tell sex with this kid was going to be something else. "You're so big, Hazza." Louis said licking down his member and then finally Louis lowered his head onto Harry very very slowly and made sure he could feel the stretch in his throat.

Harry had his hands on either side of Louis' cheeks as he guided down his head. "Fuck you look so gorgeous.. " He used his thumb to wipe a tear coming out of Louis eye, probably from the stretch. Louis pulled off and let a line of spit go from his mouth to Harry's dick drop. "Why'd you stop?" Harry looked down and Louis had his hands behind his back and smiled at Harry. "I want you to fuck my mouth." Harry scoffed and ran his finger across Louis' lips and pushed his mouth open and pushed in his cock and started to slowly thrust into Louis' mouth who had put his hands on Harry's thighs to balance himself.

A string of curse words, Louis' name and moans were coming out his mouth when he looked down at Louis' closed eyes, his mouth wide open, and he could pretty much watch his cock go in and out of his throat. Louis started to gag a little so Harry pulled out.

Looking at Louis was like looking at a porn star. "You look so fucking beautiful, baby." Harry looked down and saw saliva fall from Louis' swollen lips. "You okay, love?" He leaned Louis' face up to his and he nodded. "Get in the shower. I want you to fuck me.." The taller lad crouched down and kissed Louis' lips, saliva and all, he looked back at him with pupils blown beyond belief and licked his lips. "You want me to, or do you need me to?" Louis nodded and kissed his lips, "I need your cock in me so bad, you got me so turned on and I need you to finish me off." Harry smiled and sucked his lips into his mouth and kissed him hard and stood them both up and started to undress them both.

Louis took a second to change his oxygen out to a much longer tube and proceeded to get the water warm and looked at Harry. "I don't want to get your bandages wet..." He shook his head. "I don't mind, as long as I dry my face really well you should be okay.. Since they put actual stitches in now.." Harry had two bandages still on his face. the side of his face on the left side had five stitches and his nose to cheek had seven.. They were bandaged over but Louis could always see past them and to the guy he met that one night.

"Get in." He smiled at Louis. "Okay.." He responded.

Louis got in and got wet to get his body all the same temperature and then came in Harry who pushed him up to the wall and had something in his hand. Louis turned around. "Lube? Where the hell did you find lube?!" Harry raised a brow. "Don't question me, just enjoy me." Okay sure, he was right. Harry kicked his legs open and pulled Louis' hips out and the smaller boy pressed his chest against the cold tile making his nipples sensitive and Harry lubed his fingers and rubbed his hands together to spread it before using his middle finger to press into Louis' ass.

 Louis, instead of pulling away from the pain he pushed into Harry's finger. "Mmm someone is needy." Harry stated as he kissed between Louis' shoulder blades. He fucked Louis with his one finger before Louis was begging for more then moaning at his stretch. "I want it now, I want it so bad, Harry.." He shook his head. "One more baby, i promise, one more." He stuck the third finger in and made sure he was going deep inside Louis. He knew he was when he went to scissor his fingers and brushed against Louis' prostate which made his grab Harry's hair and arch his back. "Fuck, right there, yes." Harry smiled and fucked his fingers over that one spot for about six times before Louis' legs were shaking. "Harry I need to ride you, I need your cock.. Dammit, sit on the floor, I'm gonna ride you." Harry took no time to get to the floor and used his lube to smooth over his pulsing cock and waited for Louis to come down. 

"You tell me if I hurt you, okay? Or if you need to stop. Tell me. I don't want you to think you can just go, okay? Promise me you'll tell me." Louis nodded seriously and stared at Harry for a second, curls stuck to his face from whatever reason, his eyes were blown, his lips were red with blood from Harry biting on them and he straddled his hips and put his arms around Harry's neck and lowered himself down on him and his jaw slacked and head fell backwards as he pushed down on him. 

Harry struggling to keep back a loud moan waited for Louis to get down all the way before opening his eyes, his chest was heaving and his cock was pulsing. "Move when you want to, baby. I've got you." He told Louis who just started to fuck himself on Harry's cock and he pressed his forehead to Harry as he bounced on him. "Fuck Louis, you look so pretty. So beautiful on my cock, fucking yourself. Do you like it, baby." All Louis could do was nod and he licked his lips. Obviously high on sex to really pay attention. 

When it seemed Louis could do much more, Harry told him to stop and he pulled him up to his chest and supported his hips and started to fuck him himself. Going over his prostate Louis started to whine. "Harry, I'm gonna come.. Oh fuck, so good, so good.. Fuck I'm gonna come." Louis voice got higher when he whined and he started to get shaky. Harry grab hold of Louis cock and started to pump it in time with his thrust, getting rough with his thrusting, Louis was whining and getting handsy on Harry. "Come all over me baby, come all over me. I'm not gonna let go of you." As that was said Louis started to come warm strings of white in his hand and on Harry's stomach and it wasn't long before he clenched hard around Harry which made him go over the edge and he pulled out of him and started to come on his stomach. 

They both sat there for a minute just regulating their breathing and Louis was heaving a little more than normal so Harry bumped up his oxygen level and held him close. "I wasn't expecting that to happen." Harry finally said. "Oh bullshit. You tried to get me horny all night." Harry shook his head. "Not really, I was nervous, so I just wanted to touch you and feel you under my touch.. It's soothing to me." Louis cocked his head. "Nervous about what?" Harry sighed. "You." Louis rubbed his good cheek and smiled. "Don't worry about me. I'll be okay as long as you're around." 

They cleaned up each other, Louis wore Harry's clothes to bed that night and they ended up in Harry's bed, both close and both very much at rest

\---------------------------------------------------------

The next day Harry woke up to no Louis by his side. Instead he looked over to see Louis at his work desk staring at his beeper with a tea in his hand. "What time is it?" He asked with a groggy tone. "Afternoon, 11:59.. I've been up since like eight, i didn't want to wake you.." He scratched his scruff and never stopped looking at the pager. "How long have you been observing your pager?" Louis looked at the clock, "Since like eight." "So when you woke up?" He nodded. 

"Why?" Harry finally got up and scratched his bare chest. "Any day, Harry. Any fucking day this thing could go off, I'm the next in line for transplants... I'm waiting for it to go off and it won't fucking go off!" He slammed down his cup and put his head in his hand. "It's like watching a fucking coma patient to see if they move, but you know they won't!" He shouted a little. Harry didn't do a thing but listen to Louis and talk when he knew it was okay to. 

"I've been waiting two years. Years. I know it was only yesterday i got on the list but I just want it to go off by now." He got up and started another cup of tea and started pacing. "Louis.. I know what you're feeling.. Okay? It's okay to be angry, to be upset. to want to shout, and i encourage you to." He licked his lips. "It'll go off, I know you're next in line but they could be trying to get everything ready right now. Dr. David said it could be at least a month." Louis turned on the kettle. "Fuck a month! Fuck being in this stupid and shitty situation. Fuck these lungs. And I hate all of this. I just want it to be over by now." 

_Beep Beep Beep_

"Louis." Harry said, honestly stunned right now.   
"I mean I had the things on fucking charger all night, i kept waking up because I could hear something beep bit it was me stupid heart monitor. I mean, i know if I hadn't been here I wouldn't have met you, and I wouldn't have like fallen in love with you and all that. And like last night wouldn't have happened. But like so much other shit wouldn't have happened either. I could be in university right now working on a degree or something, did you know I play piano, I could be doing something about that!" 

_Beep Beep Beep_

"Louis!" Harry said more stern this time trying to get his attention.   
"I had to give up so much for this stupid situation, i just had to be born with shitty lungs that can't do anything right, like I don't smoke, I don't drink, I have like 40 tattoos but what does that do?! Fucking nothing, and I've seen so many people walk in and out of his stupid hospital get better and go home and get to go back to their lives and be what they wanted to when they were little and I've been in this room for like 2 years! Have you ever been in one room for two years?!" 

_Beep Beep Beep_

"Oh my god, Louis!" He said again.   
"It's just getting so frustra--" "LOUIS!" He screamed this time, Louis turned to face him. "Jesus Christ, what Harold, WHAT!"   
  
Harry just stood there with the pager in his hand and looked at Louis and gestured to it.   
 _Beep Beep Beep...... Beep Beep Beep_

"That's mine." Louis pointed and took the pager from him to read it. "Trans.. rdy... Trans.... rdy. Trans re--. TRANSPLANT READY! HARRY IT SAYS TRANSPLANT READY." Harry looked at him and laughed. "You're getting new lungs." Louis started jumping up and down. "I'M GETTING NEW LUNGS." He ran outside to his nurse and started jumping. "It's ready! it's ready! The transplant is ready!!" He started shouting and they all looked at him. 

"Okay someone call David. Louis you have to get ready, have you eaten today?" He shook his head. "Perfect. Go! Go put a gown on and sit in your room!" Harry and Louis ran back to the room and hurried to get him in a gown. "You're getting new lungs." Louis smiled and took Harry's face. "And you're getting a kidney!" They laughed. "Are you scared?" Louis shrugged. "A little, I'm just happy. You have to call my mom okay? As soon as I leave. Or right now you have to call her okay?" Harry nodded.   
  


'You'll be amazing, Lou. I'll be right here okay? When you get back, when you wake up. I'll be right here." Louis looked in his eyes and smiled a little. "Harry?" He asked. "Yes, my Angel?" Louis beamed. "I love you." To which Harry beamed. "I love you too." 

 


	6. We were staying in Paris

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Surgery day.  
> Good day.  
> Bad day.  
> Another shit chapter with a shit storm. Not sorry xD 
> 
> Thank you to everyone who has left kudos, bookmarked and who has left comments! It's so amazing to see my story reach people!
> 
> This chapter was belted out in about 2 hours but i was just ready to get it out and over with i cried writing this chapter, i'm sorry if you cry. This is about 3,800 words. It gets better from here i swear. Just ride it out with me!

She checked her hair in the mirror and reapplied her chap stick. Still dressed in her scrub work clothes, even though she knew she wasn't going to get any work done today she still showed up to work because that's what Louis would want. That's actually what he told her on the phone last night so she really had no choice.   
When the bathroom stall opened and closed and out came a woman with seemingly designer clothes and a guuci purse and Louis V glasses on her head Jay could only smile. It soon fell when she read a text from her boy and checked herself one more time. She must have looked desperate for someone to comment something to her, so when the other lady extended a little bag of tissues to her she looked confused. "You just look like today is going to be a rough day and I know these places don't have a lot of tissue outlets." 

Smiling Jay took the tissues and put them in her purse. "Oi, thank you, love.. My son is getting a lung transplant today, we've been waiting for two years for this moment, it's just really nerve racking that it's finally here, and it doesn't make it better that I work here in the midwife ward. Anne tilted her head, "Funny, my boys boyfriend is getting a lung transplant today, i haven't met him but he really insisted that I come meet him today, for, you know the odds of this operation.. Any chance your son is Louis?" Jay brightened up and chuckled, "You must be Harry's mum, yeah? Nice to meet you then, I'm Johannah but everyone calls me Jay or mum." Anne smiled and took her into a hug. "Nice to meet you to, sweet. My name is Anne, I'm sure you might know about my son? He says you have two little ladies at home that adore him." --

Walking to Louis holding room, they talked and laughed and chatted about their boys before knocking on Louis door. Seeing the boy with oxygen was hard, not in a sad way, but jay knew today was going to be the last day Louis was going to be on oxygen, it had been such a big part of their lives that Jay didn't know her son without it. Louis opened his eyes from sleeping-- the poor lad had been pumped with IV fluids all day and it was taking his strength and energy away. Louis looked up and smiled lightly. "Mum! And uh-- I'm assuming your Harry's mum, Anne, right?" He asked, Harry was in therapy for the morning but was going to be down as soon as he could. Anne had only seen Harry twice in the three weeks he had been there. It was hard for the both of them but it was saved a lot due to facetime and phone calls. "Yeah, That's me, I met your mum in the toilet of all places, We've been chatting ever since." 

"Oh, young love let me tell you." Louis teased and sat his hospital bed up. "So, darling, how are you feeling? Nervous, scared?" Jay asked, Louis just shook his head and laughed a little as he looked between the both of them. "You know I should, like i should be so scared that like, I'm going to die or something, or that something could go horribly wrong. But, I'm really excited, really calm, like I've come to peace that this is happening." Anne smiled and put her hand on Louis' "Also, Lou, is it alright if I call you that, I know Harry does." He nodded, "You're my boyfriend mum, you can call me anything you want other than boobear, that's taken already." He winked at his mum. 

"What you did, signing over your organ to Harry, and the blood from the beginning to now, I couldn't thank you more for it.. I don't know how to repay you other than love you and thank you for the life of my boy every single day. You didn't have to give him anything, but you did. And since he's been with you and been in here, he's so much calmer and doesn't have to worry about work and all that, he's been writing more songs he's been interacting more with fans, you really did it for him." Louis scrunched his face. There was a pause but he spoke up. "Sorry, I am going to reply but being from Doncaster and hearing your and Harry's accent it's just so posh, like I don't know what Harry's saying half the time because he has to articulate his stupid words all the time." They all laughed and there was a knock on the door. 

Harry walked in with a hopeful smile on his and closed the door behind him. "Mum! You made it! You been here long?" He asked hugging Jay and Anne. "No no, I just met Lou's mum in the toilet and then we've been talking for a minute, he was just talking about how posh our accents are." Harry looked over at Louis and stuck out his tongue. "Sorry i can't be from laid back Doncaster where everything sound like a meat grinder coming out of your mouth." He teased back Louis as he went to sit by him next to the bed and gave him a quick kiss. "How did therapy go?" Louis asked and everyone was curious to know. 

"It was nice, just to talk to someone you know? Like, about everything. you don't get a lot of time to talk to someone on the road and all that, traveling across the world and seeing tens of thousands of people is just, really tough to take in and keep it in. It's been nice to talk to someone about like, the worries I have, about you, about everything.. I mean there's only so much I can tell my mum, it's really really good to just tell someone something." Louis smiled and rubbed his hand. "I'm so proud of you, I know you can't talk to me about everything and there are things you don't want to talk about so I'm really proud of you for opening up to someone and telling them what's going on.  Hopefully you'll be able to be a lot less stressed on the road now." He ran a hand through his boyfriend hair and smiled. 

"That reminds me." Harry looked to his mum that nodded slightly, knowing what he was about to bring up. "I'm going on tour in six months, and i know this is asking, well saying a lot right now, but, I wanna bring you on the road with me." He looked up at Louis for a reaction and all he got was a confused look. "You want to bring me on tour with you? Don't you travel like, across the world?" Harry nodded. "I've already discussed it with my tour managers and my managers and their ready to change all my events and my flights and everything to two people if you want to come, i know it's a huge thing and you'll be away from your sisters and all but--" "Harry, Harry, slow down.." He brought their hands together. 

"I'd love to come on tour with you, as long as I can talk to my mum and sisters and just connect with them. I think that's a beautiful idea, to be able to see the world with you will be amazing. Thankfully you don't snore at night." They all smiled at each other and then Dr. David came to the door. "Louis, their setting up the OR room. I wanted to go over your papers before we wheel you in." Louis took a shaky breath and nodded. 

"So today-- it's just the transplant and the kidney removal, we'll take out the kidney first and then the lungs since it won't be that long and take as much work, then we'll stitch and staple you up. You'll go into Intensive Care, stay for two weeks tops and if all goes well, in a week Harry will get the kidney and you'll go home." Louis smiled at the word home, because the hospital was basically his home, he'd been in and out of this place for four years. For him to go back to his house with his family and friends would be a shocker. "Now, i know you asked for Harry and the mums to be in the observation room-- we can do that, however, they need to go under pen names, for protection reasons, is everyone okay with that?" They all nodded. "Okay good, we're gonna take last vitals and then I'll come in here, put you to sleep and you'll wake up in the after patient care.." Louis held up his hand. "Please tell me I won't wake up with a tube, like /please/" 

Everyone laughed. "No, you'll wake up with an oxygen mask instead." He rolled his eyes. "Get new lungs and still can't get a break!" 

Documents were signed,   
Vitals were taken,   
Tears are shed,   
Hugs were given all around,   
And lastly,   
Louis took Harry's face in his hands and said. "I love you, i'll see you when I get back to my room, and if i don't, I'll come find you." 

                                                                                                                 ----------

Walking into the observation room, Harry held onto both of Jay and Anne's hand, the two mums sat down but Harry had to look on, he had to see what they were doing to  his boyfriend. When they wheeled him in, Harry pinched his bottom lip between his fingers and watched them move his lifeless body to the operating table, they dimmed the lights and shined ones on his body. "Harry, you don't want to sit love?" Jay asked. "No.. No I'll be okay, if I feel dizzy I'll pull something up." She nodded and he watched on. 

Seeing them check his vitals and go over with everyone what was going to happen. It started. Harry watched on a screen to his right of them opening up his side. They watched as a machine was brought over to basically preserve the kidney until it was ready to give to Harry. Harry watched over the next hour as they carefully pulled out Louis' kidney, sometimes his heart rate would spike, sometimes it would go to low for a second. Harry felt like he wasn't breathing. He was sweating as he watched his boy be cut open, bleed and be wrecked. By this time Jay called into work, she couldn't go in, her eyes now glued to the screen and watching her son down below them. Anne was there as a human tissue and for support. 

When they closed up Louis and turned him on his side and pumped fluids into him Harry reached for Jay's hand as they sat down. "Here they go." She whispered and Harry squeezed her hand in response. "He's gonna make it, i know it, he can do this.. He's so strong Jay." She nodded in agreement and watched on. 

They cut his chest open, ribs exposed and blood soaked gauze when in to clean the area. Harry didn't even care that he was seeing the inside of Louis' body, he wanted to watch everything that happened. For himself, for Louis, because in his own words, Louis stated that he needed the mental images of what was going on for the cool stories to tell his kids one day and his sisters of course, how his body was so awesome on the inside and he had been brushed by death. Louis was so dramatic, Harry thought. He smiled. 

"Bring in the transplant, be ready for detachment, and replacement, we have one shot people, 45 seconds is our window to get this connected and start stitching. check vitals right now, keep an eye on everything, we have one shot, we cannot mess this up." Harry was practically shaking as he heard the doctor's words, he felt a hot tear roll down his face and he looked away for a minute. "Be strong, Harry. He's still here, he's right there." Anne told her son and rubbed his shoulders. He nodded and breathed out his mouth and watched them wheel over the machine that was pumping pure oxygen and blood into his new lungs. He stood up, being to fidgetty to sit down. 

"Starting transplant in 3..2..1.. Detaching and go!" Harry watched on as doctors took out Louis' old lungs, his chest was empty on the screen, his lungs looked over worked. Red with blood, they were covered in white blotches and some parts looked like they were dying. He watched as the new lungs basically flew into Louis' chest. The doctor started fumbling his hands a little with the placement of them. Louis' vital signs started to drop, Harry stepped closer to the glass.

"Heart rate is dropping, we need to start attaching, 16 PSI of oxygen now!" The doctor shouted as he started to carefully yet quickly stitch Louis' lungs into place. "Still dropping." One nurse said. The doctor kept on stitching and replacing, stitching and replacing, trying his best to work quickly at hand and still be careful, in the screen Harry could see Louis' heart pumping fast, out of control and somehow his heart was matching the same beat, or so he thought.

"Dropping quickly, he's getting lower." Why wasn't his heart picking up? Why wasn't Louis responding to this? Was it the doctor? Was it the lungs? Among Harry's thoughts he heard a faint noise as he clicked back into reality, a noise he wasn't yet ready or prepared to hear. A constant noise. Not a beeping noise and question marks on the heart monitor.. "No.." He whispered. "Harry come here," Anne said stepping back. "No!" He walked over to the screen and put his hands on either side of it.

"Harry come here!" Anne yelled a little. Harry looked back into the glass. "Louis!" He screamed and hit the glass once. "Get the shock cart! We have cardiac arrest, attachment is done!" The doctor screamed. Jay now trying to hold Harry back who was screaming and wailing. "Louis! Don't you dare! Don't you die on me!" He screamed, his hands being held by Jay and he dropped to the floor and the two mums came to his side. "He's gonna be okay, he's going to pull through, come on." Anne started to chant, more for Jay and Harry than herself, a woman who just met the boy.

Harry was wailing into Jay's chest. The feeling of his boyfriend dead below him was killing him, the nurses must have thought he was dying to. He felt like it, surely he did. He heard the doctor shock Louis' sides once.. twice.. three times. "Doctor!" One nurse yelled. "DON'T YOU CALL TIME YET!" He shouted. "Move, let me massage his heart. I need ice! Put ice in the chest!" Two nurses ran to do what he said. Dr. Morgan, the operating specialist putting his hands into Louis' chest and massaged his heart by hand, something doctors did as a last resort to pull a patient through. All of a sudden Harry heard him yell stop.

The sound of a heart rate was up on the screen, slow, low, but it was there. "Harry! Harry look!" Anne pointed to the screen, in the corner he watched Louis' heart beat again. He was crying for a whole new reason. Jay was holding Harry and they were both balling their eyes out, Anne was crying now too, tears of joy. In the midst of all of this Harry saw something liberating on the screen.

Louis lungs moving.

"Their moving. He's breathing.. He's breathing!" Harry pushed out a struggled laughed. "Mum he's breathing!" He looked at the two women, adopting the feeling to call them both mum. "He's breathing, baby. He's gonna make it." Anne told him and hugged him tight.

                                                                                                                 ---------- 

**29 hours later**

                                                                                                                 ----------

Louis was in a light coma. They put him there to make sure his heart was going to be okay. Harry kept replaying the moment back in his head over and over again. Louis died. Louis was dead. He saw him boyfriend dead. He hoped he never had to see that again. Ever. 

When a small click came at the door he saw Louis' nurse walk in and hand him coffee. "Thank you." He whispered as if he was trying not to wake Louis, who was in a coma. Then again this was Harry they were talking about. "How is he doing?" Harry asked the woman. "He's doing great, Harry. Responding wonderfully.. Let him wake up on his own okay? You can still talk to him, he can hear you.. But in the mean time, get some rest okay? I'll bring you a blanket." Harry just nodded and looked down at peaceful Louis. 

He put his hand on Louis' chest. He felt it rise then fall, rise then fall, rise then fall. His new lungs were working, his oxygen levels from before the transplant to now had somehow improved 97%, his breathing was some incredible. Harry had thanked the doctor so many times he lost count. The doctor that saved Louis' life. That brought him back to life. He didn't give up on Louis. Dr. Morgan simply responded that he was just doing his job and only had done was Louis requested. That he try. 

Jay had stayed at the hospital but Anne chose to go to the hotel and take a shower and nap and bring everyone back some food. He watched Jay stir quietly and smiled at her. "Get some sleep love?" She asked. Harry shook his head. "No, I can't-- I just can't stop watching him. Breathing, you know? You can hear how he breaths now.. If only I knew the people who died to give him these lungs, I'd thank the family over and over again, with so many things." 

Jay only smiled and looked around. "Do i smell coffee?" The boy laughed. "Yeah, I got some for me but have it, I can keep awake." Taking the cup she sipped it. "You've almost been awake for two days, Harry, when are you going to rest?" "When Louis wakes up of course." 

                                                                                                                 ----------

**10 hours later and Harry finally slept**

**\----------**

When Harry realized where he was he turned over in his cot to see Louis. Who had moved but that was most likely from the nurses checking his vitals. "How long did I sleep?" He asked his mum. jay went back to work and Anne was there so he wouldn't be alone. "About 6 hours. They came in and swabbed his mouth and checked his vitals, still strong.. " He smiled and nodded. Harry went tot he bathroom and brushed his teeth and came back out and sat next to Louis, his head by his side and his hand wrapped his Lou's. 

"Harry, love?" Anne asked. "Yes mum?" He said mumbled into the sheets. "You really love this boy don't you?" He sat up and stretched a little and smiled at Louis. "Yeah-- yeah I do.." Sitting his chin in his hand and looked at Lou's face and fixed his hair for him. "I haven't even known him but a month and he's just-- changed my life.. I don't think I could live without him. Did you know when I first came here and I was having bad nights and night mares and when they would poke me and change my plasters he would either sing to me or read me Harry potter books? Because those are his favorite books, and every Saturday even after we had movie night, we would go back to our room for 2 hours and watch Peter Pan because he loved it? Or he would watch Love Actually with me even though he hated it but because he loved watched me say every line in the movie?" 

His mum's smile grew so wide, she watched as Harry rubbed the older lads hands and fixed his sheets and all. "You fell hard quick, huh?" Harry nodded. "But i wouldn't change it for anything.. He's taught me smile, and laugh and to take things with a grain of sand.. Every day I wake up and think, today is going to be a good day because I'm going to make someone happy today.." "Do you think he'll be happy when he wakes up?" He nodded. "Until he heard about Emilee. God, mum, Emilee is his whole world.." 

Was. Was his whole world.. Emilee is everything Louis made himself to be. But while in his operation Emilee went into a bad place thinking about Louis and his outcomes and decided to violently purge her lunch as a way to cope. It had been three hours until someone found her on the floor with blood out of her mouth and nose. She had had a heart attack and when they tried to wake her up and give her medication, the jolt of medicine in her body caused her to have another one and she finally slipped away. When Harry had heard what time she died he couldn't help but think they both flat lined at the same time, maybe as a way to tell each other goodbye in the next life. Still he knew he was going to be crushed. 

"But you still have that note she wrote right before everything happened?" Harry nodded and pulled it out of his pocket. "I haven't read it." Anne licked her lips. "Maybe you should before you give it to him." 

He opened it and read aloud: 

 

_"With each passing day, i know my body isn't getting better though my brain is. Beauty is something accepted in the heart and not the eyes and I know that now. I know that because of you, Louis. Every day i wake up and tell myself I'm beautiful even though I don't feel like it. I feel happy when I hear you talk or watch you look at Harry like he's an angel God sent down specifically for you.. Because I know he did._

_I remember when i had my first breakdown and you told me that tomorrow is a new day and i have every chance to make it a beautiful day. But today, i can't help but see black in the white clouds outside, hear the crying of the people around me scared that you won't be here after today, and i can't help but feel in my heart that i can't carry on anymore. I've tried to be better for you, and i think i have been in a way. But holding on hurts. my body aches everyday, my muscles hurt to walk, and my lips hurt when i try to speak. I've come to terms with the fact that I'm dead already, that being alive holds to much of a burden, my anxiety keeps me tied to the bed when i just want to shine._

_I keep clutching the donation paper in my hand and thinking to myself how much I really don't deserve your heart, but you gave it to me anyway, i was so young when i met you and two years into it, I'm so happy i met you._

_You taught me how to love, myself._  
You taught me how to sing, loudly.  
You taught me how to lauge, at life.  
You taught me how to believe, in love.  
You taught me how to smile, when the sky is gray.  
You taught me how to forgive, and move on. 

_I can never repay you, however, I will find you in the next life and be with you all over again."_

Harry wiped his face and put his hand on Louis'. "She knew she was going to die.. She knew.. He's going to be so broken, mum.. He was going to give her his heart if he died, but she never got to have it." She walked around to his side and hugged him. "But she's not gone, she's never going to leave, she's always right here." She touched his heart. "And even though he will be broken and lost, he still has you." 

Just then, as she went to sit down he felt movement under his hand. Snapping to look at Louis' eyes he rubbed his hand. "Lou? Did you move? Lou, move your fingers again, love." He felt another movement. "Mum, go get a nurse. He's awake. Call Jay!" Louis started to roll his eyes around and open his eyes, trying to focus on something. Louis focused on the figure to his right, coming into view was Harry's face and he reached for his chest. "Harry.." He heard softly. 

Grabbing some water he helped his drink and clean out his throat. A nurse ran in and started to check his eyes and said she was going to call the doctor. Not much later jay ran into the room and saw Louis awake and sitting up in the bed. "Oh, my boy! My boy you're awake!" She clutched him to her chest and he hugged her back. When she moved away he took the oxygen mask off his face and Harry lunged forward to try and stop him. Louis put out his hand and stopped him, looking at his face and took a deep breath in and out. "I can breathe.." Harry smiled. "Yes, baby, you can breathe, how does it feel?" His voice was shaky and his eyes were flowing wildly. "I can breathe it feels so good. It feels so good.." He put his hand on his own chest and breathed again and smiled. 

 

Shit. Now is better than later. Harry thought. 

"Louis.." Harry called out and he looked at him. "Um-- something happened.. While you were in operation room. Two things actually.." Harry started to tear up more and Louis didn't say anything only looked at him intensely. "One uhm-- You flat lined for about 40 seconds.. After they started to attach your lungs you started to crash, and you ended up flat lining, but Dr. Morgan ended up massaging your heart and you came back." Louis nodded. "The second thing is-- um.." Harry wiped his cheeks of tears and took a deep breath to steady himself. "Emilee died, babe.. Emilee died the same time you flat lined." 

Louis dropped his grip from Harry's hand and shook his hand. "No.. No she didn't she couldn't have she was healthy, she is healthy, that's not right Harry!" He shouted a little and Harry took his hand. "She uh-- she got really really sad and had a panic attack and purged her lunch, and purged and purged and then she had a heart attack and when someone found her they tried to treat her, but she had another one and she ended up dying about 20 some hours ago... I'm so sorry.. Louis, I'm so so so sorry.. She wrote you a note before she passed away.. I guess she knew she was going to die.. " 

He handed him the note and Louis read the whole thing, twice.. He didn't really cry. He just looked shocked but also..at peace? Harry didn't get it. "Lou, babe, you okay?" Harry broke the silence. "Yeah-- yeah, do you know if her parents are going to come here?" Harry nodded. "Yeah, their going to sign papers on her release and their going to discuss with the hospital what to do with her body, i heard she signed over her belongings to you so you'll get whatever she left you." 

"She was going to give me her lungs." He whispered. "What?" Harry asked and took Louis' hand as he pushed it out to him. "She said like, a year ago that if she died ever before I got out of here, she was going to give me her lungs because when she met me she said she felt like she could breathe again.." He shed a small tear and Harry wiped it away.. 

"She's going to be happy now though.. She's probably living it up in her new life.. Probably turned into a fucking Kardashian.. Ugh she loved those girls." Harry laughed. "There's the Lou we all knew and loved. " Louis smiled, "Speaking of that, what does a guy have to do to get some food around here, I just woke up and died like yesterday, death is a huge thing I need some donuts!" 

Harry, Anne, and Jay laughed out loud and they smiled all to happy. "I'll get you some donuts you silly bird.. But after you give me a kiss and a hug and hug your mums because you scared us shitless." Lou pecked Harry's lips twice and hugged everyone in sight. "Sorry, when I die next time I'll be sure to play nickleback as I go. Or NSYNC" Harry rolled his eyes and laced their hands together. "You know what, I didn't miss you at all. You're still such a sass master." 

"Better believe it babe, you're stuck with me!" Harry softened and smiled a bit, "And that's okay because I love you." 

"And i love you, Harold Styles." 


	7. He talks to a camera

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There's going to be two time jumps in this chapter. The first one is three months, Louis is home and out of therapy and so is Harry whom is still recovering. A bit. Louis records his next 6 weeks on a video camera diary which he is instructed to either live stream or upload to the internet to not only get his story out there, but to release his emotions. 
> 
> The six month jump is a little surprise but i think and hope you guys will like it. 
> 
> Thank you so much for the kudos, bookmarks, the comments, it all. Thank you so much xxx

He sat down on Harry's bed. Beige jumper and ripped up acid washed jeans and no shoes or socks on. His hair was a bit of a mess but it worked for him. Tripod was set up and he turned towards the window for some natural lighting and checked himself in the view finder. "Alright then, here we go." 

**Log in . Start live stream . Record Live Stream .**

He sat on the computer for a second, going about his phone for a second whilst many people load in and he says hi to a few of them. 

When the time comes he clears his throat and takes a swig of tea. "Alright then we are!"

"Hello everybody, my name is Louis. Spelled L O U I S , pronounced Louis, even though sometimes my sisters call me Lewis." He smiled and chuckled a little. "So by now, it's been roughly 3 months since my life kind of turned upside down, and allow me to give you a bit of a run down of what happened with the 'boy who lived and then got together with a famous rock star' I swear I sound like i'm in a movie or something." He laughed. "Harry is actually in meetings all day today, so I've got the entire flat to meself and I've got to say, it's way to clean for me. I put me socks on the floor and I thought, oh no he's going to have a cow when he sees them. He's so posh." He smiled to himself for a second. 

"However, a lot of Harry's fans and now, my fans want to know the story of how we met. So here it is." He looked at his phone for some bullet points he actually wrote down. "So the first night I met Harry, I was sneaking around the Emergency Room floor. I always did that in hospital, I was there for like 2 years so I knew my way around, and my excuse was always to 'work out my lungs so they give me an extra day': He rolled his eyes. "And, I remember I was sat behind a corner and I saw like 13 nurses and staff all around this one lad with really shit clothing, I mean he looked like he lived in a thrift store, my assumptions were right." He laughed. "They worked for about like ten minutes on the lad and when they went away to go order x-rays and such, I just saw this boy with his eyes closed and such and honestly , the first thing i though to meself was 'God, if you're real, let this man be gay.' " 

"I moved closer so I could like over hear what they were saying, and I got caught but I heard that from another crash victim they weren't going to have-- enough blood for Harry. And I thought, well I've got the golden blood type, it's universal, I haven't taken my meds today so, I might as well help out?" He looked confused at himself. "i drank a bunch of water to pump up my blood veins and next thing I knew uhm-- I was being hooked up directly to him cause they didn't have time to bag the blood." He used his hands to make motions as he remembered so vividly, as if he was reliving it again. "Then when he woke up a little and looked over and started talking, I almost unhooked the blood machine because he was an utter ass oh my god. My best friend who was like a sister to me at the time was having Heart surgery. And I was like this fucking air head I swear. But he apologized and I let it go because he was cute and I liked his voice.. Then i fell asleep cause I was exhausted." 

He took a sip of tea and read a text from Harry and smiled. "Harry literally just asked me if 150 Pounds worth of Chinese food was okay to bring home for dinner. What do you buy in Chinese food that cost 150 Pounds. You know what were calling him. I'll set it on speaker phone." 

He pushed call and sat it on speaker phone. "Hey you!" Harry answered. "Hi, love.. I'm just really curious what on Earth did you get us? Also, before you say anything stupid or innapropriate you're on speaker phone and I'm live streaming like the doctor said." There was a signature Harry laugh and then a short silence. "I got us, dumplings, some cream cheese and crab ragoon, noodles, egg soup, some stickers, a few different chickens, I mean this is stuff to eat on for a few days." Louis nodded and smiled. "Well, are you busy or something or are you dropping the food home and then going out again?" You could tell the silence was occupied by both of them smiling when Louis called Harry's house home. Like his home, because in a way it was.

"No-- No I'm on the way home right now, I've got like a four hour break until I have to leave again. Why, talking about something interesting?" The smaller boy looked smug. "Aha-- Just the night we met, in the emergency room and I thought you looked homeless." He was reading the questions on screen when he spotted one. "Louis what was your first reaction when you found out what Harry did for a living." He repeated. "To be honest, i didn't really react at all, the boy gave some McDonalds before showing me the news, He had a way to my heart instantly. But honestly, I don't know, he just seemed like a normal bloke that got in a bad accident, he looked decent, aside from the stick up his arse when I met him. He wasn't that bad. I mean my sisters watch him all the time but I didn't pay much attention to him."

Harry scuffed on the other end. "Thanks, babe. I feel so loved." Louis smiled.

"However, later that night right before Harry went into surgery for the cuts on his face and all that he started to cough blood and I was really scared he was going to die, i was already an emotional wreck, they kicked me out and I had no idea what to think until Niall came to me the next morning." Harry hummed, "Niall went to you?" "Yeah he said you wanted to see me that day."

Just then, Harry walked into the bedroom, Louis completely unaware that he had come in the home. "Jesus H Christ, Harry! Let me live with the new lungs for a minute, yeah!?" He laid on the couch and everyone was putting up laughing faces on the screen. "Oh yeah, laugh away gals and boys." He rolled his eyes when he felt Harry reach for his hands and pulled him to a seating position, Harry had pulled up a chair and they both smiled at each other before a small kiss was exchanged.

Smiling for a second more at each other before looking at the screen and seeing everyone go crazy. "Alright, alright we don't want to break the internet." Harry laughed and started to unbox the food. "Oh, babe it smells amazing." Louis put his hand on his stomach. "Thought you'd like it, anyway, I never told Niall i wanted to see you.. I talked about you but I never asked to see you." Louis looked confused. "He said he thought I should go see you and I said no, i didn't want to be in the way. He was like, Actually he requested the he see you." The curly lad shook his head. "That Irish lad, him. Trying to always be match maker. " Louis kicked him in the shin "It worked, dinnit?" Harry just put a dumpling in his mouth.

\----

After a few minutes of talking to fans and chatting about their questions and all that. Surprisingly the most common one being who is top and who is bottom. "Oh! Love this. Ready? Harry is practically a bottom, but he's got muscles on him. He could throw me around like a rag doll if he wanted to, he has a bit before, he can get rough, it's sexy i have to say." Harry laughed. "You make it sound like I take you by the leg and wave you around." 

Harry cleared his throat and put down his food, Louis got apprehensive when he saw his face. "So, can I ask you a question, babe?" Louis nodded. "It might be to personal to ask, but-- uhm.. Do you-- uh--" He chuckled to himself for a second and Louis spoke up. "Do i remember dying?" Harry nodded. "Yeah-- I do. It's really vivid.. it was the most beautiful thing I'd ever seen."  

He went onto explain. "So like, imagine that like, you stopped time. That's what it felt like, it felt like time was stopped but everything was still moving. You could walk around and do whatever you wanted, i saw my sisters. I saw my mum and my dad, and my step dad. They were all just being really happy for the moment, sisters were in school, Lottie was doing whatever it is that Lottie does. I watched my mum handle babies.. I saw you-- I mostly saw you watching me... It was really hard to watch, but then I could like, play it like I hadn't died and they were still just working on me, innit?" 

"You were just staring at the monitors, walking around, I could hear you breathe and it wasn't a lot I tell you. But it really made me think how I feel about you. Cause at this point, Harry had known me 3 weeks." He looked to the computer. "He just learned my middle name. Like two days ago, but he had known me 3 weeks at this point and to think I could make such a life changing impact on this little curly haired train wreck.. It was really liberating, I had time to think about a lot of things, and what I wanted to do in my life." He rubbed Harry's leg. "And at the same time, i kept thinking, it's quite nice here I can do whatever I want and make life how I wanted. But then another part of me was like, but how would it turn out if you lived again, what would happen in five- ten- twenty years. And honestly, I had the ability to see what that was like when I was dead. " 

"But I didn't want to see it, I didn't want to spoil the future." He licked his lips and grabbed a sip of tea. "I thought, I'm died, got to be, I'm not in a coma. I have so much and so many people to live for. I get these new lungs.. Someone died to give me these new lungs.. What a second chance at life, you know? I've got to see how this happens now, like what if Harry proposes to me, or what if we adopt kids." 

Harry smiled. "You want to do all that?" He asked surprised. "Yeah--Yeah I do, Known you three months and I want to marry you, sick, innit?" Harry laughed. "Then I saw Emilee. Which was like my sister, she had anorexia, really bad, she kept relapsing.. At the time i didn't know she was dead, or had died while I was being operated on. But, she just looked so--- at peace, like something really really good happened." He smiled. "Like, maybe it was because she didn't have to hurt anymore. She didn't have to deal with her mental illness. But she looked, so healthy, like meat on her bones, a good weight. She looked like everything went into place with her, she didn't say a single word to me, and at that point I was like, yeah, it's worth going back home. And when I said home, I really didn't think of a place, I just knew that you, my mum and family and my friends were home, like home was a person, not a place." He elaborated. 

"So I kind of teleported, which was cool as fuck. I looked down at my body, I got really really scared for a moment, I was like what if these lungs don't work out, what if Harry thinks he doesn't want to be with me, so I paniced, I think that's when my heart finally gave out.. You know? Then I understood what people said about that light, that you see when you die.. But it wasn't a light it was me grand parents.. Their dead now. And I just kind of looked at them and was like what do I do?" He moved a hand to his hair. "They just kind of said, you need to go home. You've got far to much to do before you get to be with us, you're okay, it's going to be okay, but you need to go home. I was like, okay, cool, set.. I'm going home." 

Harry wiped his face and sniffled. "Yeah-- the surgeon had to massage your heart to get it to work again, it took like, three minutes of him massaging, he wouldn't give up." Louis nodded, "Yeah, yeah! I remember seeing that, I was like trying so hard to figure out how do I get back into this body.. Then I just looked at the surgery door, and something told me if I just leave that room, take a deep breath, it would be okay. So I calmed down and just walked to it, next thing I know, that's when I woke up." 

Harry noddded as he swallowed the food in his mouth and licked his lips. "But now you're home and you're better." Louis nodded and wiped his mouth. "And you have my kidney." Harry scoffed. "Yeah, now I wee every five minutes." Harry smiled getting up to of course going to the bathroom. "Hey, I mean i can have it back!" He shouted out. "Nope, It's as close to your heart as I can get!" 

Louis smiled and smirked at the camera. "Didn't think this would be how dating Harry Styles would go, but I guess I'll take it... I think that's all for today everyone, it would be really nice if you go buy and stream Harry's new album, I helped him finish a few songs so i'm happy.. He goes on tour in 7 months! So, there's that as well." He winked and waved at the camera and ended the stream before exiting out of the window

\------

6 months later 

First TV appearance ; The late late show with James Corden. 

\------

"Yeah but doesn't the tv add like ten pounds?" Louis asked while getting his hair fluffed and taken care of. 

"Oh my god Louis, you're ass alone is ten pounds." Louis smirked. "You weren't complaining about it last night in the hotel room now were you?" Harry rolled his eyes. "On in five guys, we need to go!" Called out the stage manager. "Nervous?" Asked Lou, Harry's hair stylist. "No.. Actually. I think because I've watched James for so long it's like I know him.. And Harry makes it easier.." He saw his boyfriend smile out of the corner of his eye and he got up and walked with him towards the curtain behind the stage and he could hear James talking. 

Louis looked to his boyfriend and fixed his hair out of his face and he gave him a kiss and smiled. Soon enough they were hearing the words: "And now introducing Harry Styles, and his boyfriend, Louis Tomlinson for his first TV debut ever! Bring 'em on out!" Just then the curtain moved open and Louis smiled big and child like and waved his hands as he walked out and greeted James with a hand shake and a hug. Sitting down before who still sat on his right side because that's where Louis liked him. 

"Wow, so Louis, this is your first time being on TV, yeah?" Louis nodded a little. "Well i've been in front of the camera before, i did a bit of acting when I was little, I was in a few shows and I had the lead in a movie. But were not going to talk about that." Everyone laughed. "Wow, okay.. So you do know that you guys are literally the power couple of the industry right now, how is that going for you, Louis? I mean I've seen you been papped a few times, is that a weird thing or?" Louis thought about it for a second before looking at Harry. "Well Harry, was the one who brought it up at first to me, I was taking a day out of the hospital with my late best friend, Emilee. And he was like, people know who you are, they know your name and what you look like, just be careful. I was like yeah whatever, okay, no one is going to care about me, I'm a small lad yeah? Well that was some shit because I got papped getting into my car, going to the zoo and I almost got mobbed at the zoo. I was like, alrighty then. Harry uh-- Harold was right." 

"No, okay listen." Harry interuppted. "The first time we got pictured together, I think it was the day I got to come home after I got my transplant. And Louis walks out and says, 'Woah hold on' like he was worried or something, but no, he goes 'if you could get this side of me, my bum looks way better this way." Everyone busted out laughing. "Not at all phased that there were 40 cameras getting pictures of him, just, get this side of my arse." Louis laughed and took Harry's hand in his and Harry brought it up to his lips and kissed it. To which everyone awed. 

"So, what was your first impressions of each other? I mean finding love in hospital, got to be the first on your list of places to find a hook up yeah?" Louis smiled, and looked at Harry. "You go first, I'm curious." Harry laughed. "Let's let it be known I was very very drugged when I met this man. Alright. Thank you. Uhm. When I first saw him I was like, those have got to be butt implants and why is this very sassy, very tiny man giving me blood when he doesn't even know my name, though he probably does." James nodded. "Did you know who he was, when you met him, Louis?" He shook his head. "Not a bit, my sisters do. But i didn't I was just like, oh another homeless guy in the emergency room who knows, but then i saw him and i was like oh my god jesus let this man be gay. or just a little bit gay." Harry laughed along with everyone. "Um, but I mean, he needed blood and the hospital was low so I was like, the least i can do for getting caught down here is do something good. But i gave him blood, then he became my roommate, then he took my kidney. I mean he's stuck with me now, he can't not have me. if we break up, he still has my kidney." 

"That's so....cute?" James laughed. "How long have you guys been together?" Harry spoke up first. "Six months today." Everyone awe'd "That's amazing, six month, you guys must have gotten together like as soon as you met? Jesus, some blood and you go all crazy for a person." Harry smiled and looked at Louis. "I mean, we got together like three weeks after meeting but I think it was meant to be, you know how people are like, oh you'll know when you meet them. I kind of knew I was going to be really good friends with him but, I didn't think I'd end up dating him. " James leaned in now, both hands under his chin like he was so interested. 

"I don't think we ever made it a real day. I think we just became a thing when we first kissed?" Louis questioned a little at Harry who nodded. "See I first kissed him when I had gotten back from my day out with Emilee, and I saw an thing on my bed, I was like great another hospital bill, I'm already so broke. Well apparently, this little shit had met and talked to my mum that day and he gave her a check to pay off my hospital bills and then gave her more money to give my family. So i open this letter and it says Paid In Full. I was like you did not just pay my hospital bills, and he's just smug little shit over here and I was like, I could punch you right now but i could also kiss you. So i was like screw it, and just hopped over and laid one on his lips and it was like then, i was like, yep I'm stuck with this lad, Doesn't matter if he's not gay, he just kiss me and he's still kissing me, so i guess it's serious?" 

A mix of awes and laughs came through and Harry was hiding his blush by now and Louis smiled and kissed his cheek.  

"So, Harry, you're going on Tour and Louis is accompanying you, right?" He nodded, "Yeah I asked him right before he went into surgery. What a way to ask your boyfriend to travel with you." He looked at the audience. "Like, hey, i know you're about to go into surgery and you might die, but would you like to travel the world with me?" "But hey, it worked. I mean, I did die, that's the thing, but I'm still going to see the world, I think that's the best second chance at life, yeah?" 

"So, tell us, Harry about the tour.. And then tell us about the album." 

"So, the album is called Over the Castle. The tour is called the Castle Tour, were going to America, Cananda, Mexico, Europe, Ireland, Norway, I think Italy too... China, for the first time, and then I  have about a three week break somewhere, and then we're doing some refugee work in Africa then it ends in America. There's 250 shows. My biggest tour ever, there is VIP meetings and Pizza groups, and then there's like sound check and all that. It's going to be amazing, I'm going out for I think 8 months, something like that.. And I get to take Louis with me.. And he wrote and sings a song on the deluxe addition of my album. " James eyes lit up. "Louis? Is that true?!" The boy looked smug. "I don't want to toot my own horn but yeah it is.. I wrote this song called Just Hold On. For Emilee. She died the same day i had gotten my transplant, so i wanted to dedicate a song to her, because if she had lived and I had actually died she would have gotten my heart so.. Yeah there's a song for her." 

"Are you going to preform it on the tour?" Louis shrugged a little. "I mean I talked with Harry's manangers about it, there might be a few shows in the beginning and to see what everyone is going to do and how they respond to it. but I think it'll be good." He nodded. "I think.. I think i saw like something like an adoption paper or something like a fan wrote up something.." "Oh yeah!" Harry exclaimed. "A fan wrote like a handwritten like marriage approval or something, it was like if you declare your love for each other then sign here and choose what last name you want. So i think we settled on like, Styles-Tomlinson? And we signed it and everyone was like, okay Louis is one of us now we have him." 

"How adorable. Have you guys wanted to get married?" Harry looked over at Louis lovingly and rubbed his thigh. "I mean, we've talked about it, we want to, but not right now were wanna just live a little before we get married." He smiled.   
"Who do you think will propose to who?" They both smiled. "We've already decided Harry is going to propose. He has to make sure it's memorable. There has to be flowers involved. Someone to film it. And he has to make sure my bum looks good that day, I gotta have a good bum on the day i get engaged. And the ring has to be black steel.. " Harry rolled his eyes and rubbed his face. "Do you think you're ready for this Harry?" Asked James. 

"Absolutely not, but I wouldn't give it up for the world.. He's all I want." 


	8. End. Epilogue.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It kills me to write the last chapter . But here are some speculations and some answers to questionsyou have .

I haven't written anything in a long time .

Writing just hold on was the first in years . Writing pulls me out of my depression and it helps my anxiety .

Which is why I'm excited to start new novels .

Originally this was going to be a ten chapter series .

However, I couldn't think of a better way to end the fix with Harry saying he's not ready for marriage but he's so in love with Louis .

Any questions that you have might be answered below . If not hot one in the comments and I'll answer it .

Louis and Harry take their transplants just amazing.   
They your the world together and see sights they never thought of.

Louis expressed one night that he wants to be proposed to in front of Christ the Redeemer .   
Harry does just that two months into the tour .  
Louis says yes.

They get married in Hawaii and adopt 2 kids . A boy and girl.

They go on to be the power couple of Hollywood cause why not

**Author's Note:**

> Twitter: _BellaAnastasia  
> Tumblr: ohforfucksakesniall  
> Insta: _Bella.Anastasia


End file.
